Thirty-One Letters

Thirty-One

The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief. But the pain of grief is only a shadow when compared with the pain of never risking love—Hilary Stanton Zunin

The next two weeks that passed were the fastest of Hadley's life. It felt as if the days passed within the span it took to blink.  She was so busy that, while she had opened Tanner's twenty-eight letter – a cryptic note telling her to just 'take a chance' – she had made no move yet to complete it. Between work and training, she barely had time for anything else.

Well, anything else that wasn't Ty.

They had spent nearly every free moment together, trying to make up for the time that they both knew they would be losing very soon.  Together they did all of the things they had yet to do, like going to the movies on a double date with Casey and Ian or playing mini golf and grabbing a late night burger afterwards.  On one afternoon, Penn and Ty taught Hadley how to play both lacrosse and soccer, which was followed by a lively debate as the brothers once more fought over whose sport was better.

Many hours passed where Hadley and Ty simply basked in each other's company.  They ran along the beach in the early morning sunrise, Bandit sprinting next to them.  In the evenings they pulled collapsible chairs out towards the water and sat looking up at the stars, lamenting about another night not so long ago where a boy had taken his brother out hunting for turtle nests only to find a lonely girl stargazing.

There was still so much Hadley wanted to do with Ty.  So many experiences they hadn't yet shared and him leaving made Hadley wonder just when, if ever, they would get those chances.  But it was a blessing, Hadley told herself when the days felt as if they were growing shorter and shorter, that they had this time at all.

Somehow, it was August eighteenth.  Ty was leaving for California in two days.  He had an early flight though and would be leaving for the airport at six in the morning on the twentieth.

Two days but shortened into one because Hadley had insisted that Ty spend his last day with his family.  It had been a hard call for Ty, who insisted that he would rather have that final day with her before leaving, but it was Hadley who was laying down the law.  Not for herself.  God only knew how much she wanted to have that last day with him. 

It was for Penn that she insisted.

"I got to have you this summer," Hadley had told Ty one morning as they'd walked hand-in-hand down the boardwalk.  "Penn has had you for the last fourteen years and he should get to spend your last day of summer with his brother.  Our last day being on the eighteenth or nineteenth won't change how much I care about you."

"What's one day," he'd replied, a sad smile on his face, "when you're not really saying goodbye."

"Exactly.  It's not goodbye.  It's just...see you later."

Not like that made it any easier. 

But it had made Hadley feel better.  As if they were simply taking a pause in the middle of a conversation that was surely going to resume.

Still, she was trying not to focus on it.  The last thing she wanted on their last day was for her to be preoccupied with the fact that he was leaving.  It would do neither of them any good to sit around feeling sorry for each other. Hadley wanted to be able to look back on this day and smile.

It was just before eight in the morning when Ty knocked on the window that led to Hadley's bedroom. She'd showed him one afternoon how she'd used to climb out since it was a bungalow and the drop was slight.  Ty had found it humorous and a little surprising but hadn't balked when Hadley had told him to meet her there that morning.  She hadn't wanted to wake her parents by creating a lot of noise when she left.  They already knew that she was going to be spending the day with Ty but she figured that they'd rather sleep in than listen to her banging doors as she went.