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It wasn't supposed to be this way and Jaime knew that. They were brother and sister. Jaime knew that he loved her. How could he not? She was a beautiful maiden. Long golden hair, with emerald eyes so like his own. She was even beautiful as a babe, as his father had told him. When their mother had found them tangelg together bare and naked like when they first came into this world, she had demanded them to get dressed and to sleep in seperate chambers at the completly opposite derections and had a guard, guard the doors at night.
Yet, Jaime knows that Cersei is powerhungry and selfish. In her youth she was carefree and laughed easily, but when their mother died everything fell apart. Their father became cold, colder then he was before and never smiled. The whole Casterly Rock was in mourning and griving. Their Lady Joanna was the light in the west. But now she was dead, and everything went from happy and beautiful to cold and sad.
Yet, Jaime knows that Cersei is powerhungry and selfish. She is rude and very prideful. His father even commented about Cersei's rudness and unladylike behaviour but Cersei was stubborn and unable to see her faoults. Sometimes Jaime even wonders why he loves her, or even care about her at all.
Aelinor was the exact opposite. She was carefree, happy, kind, dutiful and generous. She helps if needed, and always tries making people smile. She put other peoples happiness over hers. She was loved by everyone in Westeros. Every Lord wants to marry her, Aelinor is like the maiden reborn. Cersei and Aelinor both have beauty, but Cersei is cold and selfish while Aelinor is kind and selfless. They were completly oppisate.
Jaime and Cersei were born together and they had always told themselves that if the Targaryens did it, it would not matter if they did. They knew it was wrong and would have consecuenses in the future but neighter had cared.
With Cersei she had always been the dominant one, suprisingly. She would always lead and be the leader. While Jaime never cared for stupid Lordly duties, only sword training. When Cersei demanded that she also learn how to weild a sword she was denied cruly by his father. Saying that, that was not ladylike. That left Cersei to learn how to dance, sing and sewing.
With Cersei, Jaime had always been manipulated. He had felt cheated and uncared for.
But with Aelinor, he had felt loved. He had felt like he was just a boy, no a man in love. There was no strict father demanding him he get out of the kingsguard or a twin who he fucks. He had been free.
Aelinor had said those three little words to get him to hear her. Those words left Jaime even more stunned then being weak and stabbed.
Everytime Jaime closes his eyes he sees Aelinor's gentle purple-pink eyes. He sees her silver-gold hair with her soft smile that would make every man melt. He saw her helping children and demanding the king to let a child go for stealing a loaf of bread instead of being burned. He saw her, not Cersei.
