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"What's going on?" I asked as the brothers walked over. York was in clear sight now, it's tall walls a promise to the future of my people. The sun glimmered with spectral hope, a sight to behold. York was a prominent town within the kingdom of Mercia, which was ruled over by Wessex since the death of Queen Kwenthrith. In all honesty, I'd always found her life to be a tragedy. My father loathed her as much as he loathed me, calling her unnatural. And, just as I would some day do, she had risen to the throne through murder and deception as she fought against the awful rule of men.
Men. Why did they rule? They caused wars and violence for their own selfish gain, never thinking of the affect such troubles had upon their kingdom. Men were all the same, taking without ever giving back. They destroyed and conquered with tyranny. Sometimes, despite my disdain for them, I wonder whether my life would've been easier if I'd been born a man. Perhaps my magic would've been a miracle, instead of a curse. Perhaps I would've been a messiah, instead of a witch.
"We are waiting." Ubbe spoke decisively, making my eyes turn to his younger brothers.
"What for, exactly?" I questioned carefully, my eyes narrowed suspicion.
"One of their saints days." Ivar spoke up finally, though his deep blue eyes were fixed on distant lands still.
" We're attacking while they're defenceless? " I asked again, folding my arms as I always did when frustration had taken over me. The brothers had clearly learnt to pick up on my body language, as I watched as they exchanged glances.
"Its better they die than us." Hvitserk spoke finally, shrugging as he walked past. Ivar soon followed, both of them returning to camp while I walked over to Ubbe.
" Your idea? " I inquired. He gave a small nod, watching the fall walls of York. "And I wonder what Ivar's plan for finding that information is."
Just as I finished speaking, the youngest ragnarsson called his brother over angrily, and I watched as they all left and made their way into the woods.
My green-blue eyes watched them leave, lips pursed as I deduced they were likely up to no good. In my time among the men, I'd come to the conclusion that they were not to be trusted. Despite my fondness for them growing, I knew why I was here. Once they'd achieved their goal, I would only be in their way. And once I'd achieved mine, they would be in my way. From both perspectives, it seemed that we'd be enemies soon enough anyway.
Before I could even coherently finish my thoughts, I was jolted back to reality by the echoing screams of children. For a moment, I believed we were under attack. That, however, proved to be false when I watched men drag two young Saxon boys into the centre of camp. Ivar crawled behind them with a wicked grin, Hvitserk beside him - while Ubbe trailed behind solemnly.
"What is going on?" I demanded, facing Ubbe for my answer as though he would give me a more reasonable explanation.
Before the older of the three could speak, however, Ivar interjected. "We're sacrificing them." He spoke bluntly, his eyes cold despite his smile. "To the Gods."
My anger rose as I stood between the men and their prey defensively, looking down as the boys watched me with hopeful eyes. "If your Gods wish for such a sacrifice, perhaps they are not Gods worth worshipping." I spat.
"I didn't know you cared so much about christians." Ivar narrowed his eyes at me as his warriors began to surround us. " perhaps you're more like them than we thought. "
As I assessed the situation, I realised how outnumbered I was. No matter how powerful I was, I couldn't take York if I'd already killed Ivar's men. Slowly I backed away, the two boys grasping at my skirt desperately as I tried to avoid eye contact. I had to remember what I was fighting for. Two lives was nothing compared to the hundreds I would save. Nevertheless, seeing them brought guilt to my heart, and it hurt to even consider leaving them at the mercy of such a monster. As I turned and left, Ubbe followed closely behind. I didn't see him at the time, but Hvitserk stood beside his little brother watching us go, with one foot beside Ivar and the other ready to run over to us.
"What you did there..." Ubbe began, looking down at me sympathetically. I supposed he could see the hurt on my face, as I saw the same hurt on his. "It was good of you." He almost sounded surprised, as though it was the first time that he'd sensed humanity within me. For that, I couldn't blame him. I was cold, ruthless, bitter, and filled with hate. But despite everything, I was no monster. I'd seen real monsters, and they were everpresent in my mind. No, all I did, I did for the good of my people. I was ruthless, but I was not heartless. There was still good in me, somewhere deep down.
" I wouldn't see an innocent child executed. " I answered quietly, briefly glancing back at the boys as the screamed contour help. "I can't watch them die, Ubbe."
" Sometimes, " He answered calmly, avoiding the sight behind us at all costs. "You have to do something bad to do something good."
