As Long As I Live

The Statement

Updating so soon. Yay me!!
God, I worked hard on this chapter!

Enjoy!!

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"M..Mayra?"

Her gaze was fixed at the ceiling as she frowned in obvious confusion and pain. At the sound of Aamir's voice, her eyes snapped to his. Disbelief marred her features as she looked at her husband, as though seeing a ghost.

She had never seen him as such. Dark circles under his eyes, so dark they almost looked like bruises. He hadn't shaved, his hair was messed up, clothes wrinkled and he looked like he had lost a lot of weight.

But what was the most different thing was they way he was looking at her. His eyes. There was no anger, no disgust. But the strong emotion in his eyes, and the reason why there was a sheen of tears there, she could not tell.

"Mr Hassan, please leave. I have to call the doctor to check her, and then the police will record her statement."

Aamir saw Mayra's eyes widen at the mention of police. Thank God she hadn't lost her hearing, but he wanted to reassure her. She had nothing to fear, not anymore.

"Mayra, don't be afraid."

"Mr Hassan, leave! You can't speak to her as yet!" The nurse ushered him away, pushing him out the door. He turned back to look at Mayra one more time, joy at seeing her finally awake radiating warmth in his heart, yet what he saw made him want to run back inside to hold her in his arms.

Mayra was looking at him with longing, for reassurance, her hand which he had been holding raised towards him, silently asking him to hold it once more. Not to leave her alone.

The nurse pushed him out as a doctor rushed in. The Inspector walked up to them and asked, "Did he say anything to her?"

The nurse shook her head proudly and said, "I got him out before he could say anything to threaten her."

The Aamir of old, before having being changed by Mayra would have picked a fight at that. Would've probably threatened to have the nurse fired. But this Aamir chose to remain silent and brought his temper under control.

Never again would he give Mayra a reason to call him what she had in her diary.

A cruel, heartless monster.

I hate Aamir.

I want to die.

What had he done? On that miserable day that Mayra wrote those words in her blood, what had he done!

"She's in perfect mental condition to record her statement, Officer." The doctor said as he poked his head out the door and gestured the policeman and the nurse back into the room. Aamir knew he would have to wait outside, fearing what would happen. He didn't care for himself, he didn't want the police to force Mayra to relive the pain that she had recorded in her diary. But he wanted to know too. He needed to know, was she actually suicidal?

Of course she was, he thought sadly. Her agonized death wish, in blood no less, was ample proof to the fact. But that was nearly a year ago. 13th February. What on earth had happened, what the hell had he done?

God he hated himself so much!

What could have been more terrible than all the other things he'd already done to her? He couldn't, for the life of him, remember what had happened, neither did he know who to ask.

His father? No, definitely not. He'd end up in the ICU after asking that question. His mother? She'd probably become hysterical at the mention of blood. Khalid? Yeah, maybe he would know.