Shrek X Joe Biden X Donald Trump - A Love Story

Where It all Began.....

Trump POV:

"DONALD, WAKE UP!!!! "

Ugh, what is that god awful sound I just heard? I think it was my mother.

All of a sudden, I was being beaten to death with a shoe. 

"Get your lazy ass up or you will be late for your first day of school!" 

Oh my god. I jumped out of bed, while my mother continued to beat with her shoe until I finished breakfast. Once I was done with breakfast, I started my daily routine. I sprayed on a tan until I looked like a perfect beach babe with orange skin. I then sprayed cat piss on my hair to give it that golden shine. After that I put on bright pink lipstick and some eye liner, and I made the wings so big a bitch could fly with them. I added some light mascara and thought I looked GORGEOUS.  I quickly put on my my thigh high socks that looked  like cats. ADORABLE. I then put on the rest of the school uniform. I looked like a sexy anime girl uwu. I then accessorized like the king I am and put on cute little cat ears, and my Rolex.

I checked the time and it was already 8:00 a.m. "oh no" I thought, as I ran out the door. My school is 8 hours away, but I have the power of god and anime on my side, so I Naruto ran at the speed of sound and got there in 2 minutes. 

I started walking to class, and that's when I saw him. The hottest guy at Obama High school. JOE BIDEN. All the boys and girls at my school want to get with him, but I am not like the other girls. He repulses me. Why can't he just be a good lil boy and stick to one girl at a time? The only thing he has going for him is his looks. Nothing else. He is so rude and stuck up. 

I looked the other way to keep myself from barfing and saw my dark and edgy friends uwu.  Their names are Shaquisha and Rachel. 

"Oh my god hey gurll." they said in unison. 

"hey gurllss how y'all doin?"  I said. 

"oh you know just checking Joe out, he's so hawt <3"

 "Oh my god shaquisha I thought you weren't like other girls, I don't know if we can be friends </3." I half  joked. I mean, I would totally be like the other boys and girls and have the fattest crush on him if only I wasn't so edgy (ugh). I walked over to my seat and stared out the window,  deep into thought until I heard somebody whisper in my ear. 

" Hey how you doin lil mamma? Let me whisper in ya ear, tell you somethin ya might like to hear." 

I turned around and saw Biden!! What the hell. Why does he, of all people, have to sit behind me?

"What do you want Biden?" I snapped at him. 

" damn bebe gurl calm down. I was just wondering if you want to party with me tonight shawty ahaha." 

who the hell does he think he is?? "Uhh no. You're gonna have to try harder than that if you ever want me going anywhere with you!" I told him off, as I should. He needs to be put in his place, or he will stay a cocky bastard forever. ugh. 

" damn gurll you feisty. I like that in a person, so I guess i'll keep tr-" 

He didn't get to finish his sentence as the teacher cut him off, saying that we will be doing a project about the book we read over the summer, worth 69% of our grade. God she is such a pig faced bitch. 

"and Trump will be with Biden."

Huh? What did the pig just say!? no no no this can't be happening. I turned around to see a very happy Biden. He was smirking and staring deep into my soul, he knew how much I hated him but he didn't care as he continued to stare at me with those big blue eyes that looked like an endless sky and a beautiful smirk that fitted perfectly on his wrinkly face.

"looks like we are partners baby gurll." he needs to shut up. 

"Whatever let's just go to my house after school so we can get this over with."  

He gave me a stupid look. "No can do. I have a party to get to and hot bitches to see." 

This made me very angry, so I started yelling at him. "Fuck you and your party, you're gonna help me with this project after school and that is final, you asshole." 

Every body looked shocked as I ran out of the classroom.  As I ran I couldn't believe that I just said that. I hate him but I didn't need to shout like that, now people will look at me weirdly when I pass them in the halls. I can already hear the whispers ( in the distance people began whispering)

" why is she running?" person 1 said turning to look at person 2 " Ugh I hate freshmen why do they think they have to run every where?" person 2 said to person 1 as they begun to walk down the hall and discuss how much they hate the freshmen's behavior. 

TIMESKIP TO LUNCH

"Oh my god, gurrlll you marvelous bastard, you looked so cool during class. Biden deserved to be called out like that." Shaquisha and Rachel said in unison like a pair of creepy twins. 

I tuned them out and looked across the lunchroom, where I saw Biden talking to a girl with green skin. They appeared to be sharing a RaW onion. I quickly recognized the her. It was Shrek. Shrek used to be part of my friend group, before she ditched us to go date Fiona. Fiona was a basic bitch who drank a caramel macchiato every Moring and wore ugg boots and a pink jacket and leggings. Shrek used to be so deep and poetic. She used to say she liked onions because they have layers, like her.  Whenever I think about Shrek I get a little angry, because I used to love Shrek and she just left me.  When I needed her most she vanished.

And now whenever I see Shrek and Fiona  together I get angry because after like a hundred years she decides show back up wearing basic ass clothes like her hideous girlfriend. But right now she is talking to Biden. Why though I thought she was dating Fiona. I know that Biden is the hottest guy in school but why isn't she sharing that onion with Fiona. 

   I  heard the bell and ran back to class. I tuned everything out for the rest of the day as I thought deeply about why Shrek was getting so close with Biden. Did she break up with Fiona? Is that why she is pursuing Biden as her next love interest? Well if that's the case then I have to stop Shrek from getting what she wants, she did leave me when I need her most one hundred years ago.  Once I heard the bell, I grabbed all my things, grabbed Biden by the hand, and started running at the speed of light all the way to my house. 

"wow Donald, I didn't know you could run so fast" 

ugh this bitch 

"you can't call me Donald yet we aren't that good of friends, and I can only run so fast because I have the power of god and anime on my side". 

He really pisses me off but I need to stop Shrek from getting what she wants. 

"Key word yet" he said with a goofy grin plastered on his face.  The sun was hitting his wrinkly pale sweaty skin perfectly. 

I couldn't help but blush. "Let's just get started on this project already." I was super flustered, and a little angry at myself for not being able to act cool. If I actually want this plan to work I need to play it cool and make Biden catch feelings for me, but this is a dangerous game if I'm not careful I could end up catching feels and being played by the most notorious fuck boy in my school.

"I think that is good for one day, Biden, I'll take you home." I grabbed his hand, and I saw him blush as I ran all the way back to school, and left him standing there in awe. 

When I got home I prayed to lord Harambe, asking if I should pursue my new plan. I then shook a magic 8 ball to see what the all powerful Harambe said. I got an undecided answer. If Harambe couldn't tell me what I should do, Then i'll just have to wing it ;)