Swish

.08

Jared and Sara escaped the dinner table once the spaghetti plates were cleared and I found my eyes unwillingly following my ex boyfriend's silhouette, with my cousin's hand firmly placed within his grasp. 

The moment his chestnut brown hair disappeared around the corner, I returned my gaze to the table, finding Eli watching me intently.

"What?" I snapped, and he only placed his hands up in the air in a surrender motion.

"Dad, I think I'm going to head up to my room.  I have some homework to do and I need to do some recording for the band."

"Okay sweetie, just make sure you come down before bed and we can have our dessert."

Ah, my midnight snack routine with dad.  Every night that I was home before bed, I'd come downstairs and my dad would be there waiting at the counter with brownies, chocolate cake, ice cream...anything sweet really.  It wasn't great for my figure, but it did wonders for our communication.  I hadn't been as close to my dad before my mom's death, but after he implemented the midnight snack as our way of checking in, I realized that we were closer than I'd thought.

"Of course," I told him, pushing back the chair to stand up, but in doing so, Eli was making a move to stand as well.

My chair leg caught on his chair leg, mine wobbled, his didn't, and down down down I went, tumbling to the ground...or I would have, if a pair of swoon worthy muscled arms hadn't caught me in my wake.

Fresh goosebumps erupted along my skin, lifting the tiny hairs on my arms and sending chills careening down my spine.  His hands were cool along my forearms where he'd caught me, and as I tried to stand up, one found its way to my waist and I choked on a breath of air and started coughing like I'd hit my ribs on something on the way down.

"Are you okay?"

I ignored my dad and put as much distance between myself and Eli without making eye contact, just knowing for a fact that he'd been laughing at me if that smirk he threw my way was any indication.

"I'm fine. I'm going to my room now," I said awkwardly and left the dining room without a single look back.

I. Was. Mortified.

I trudged the stairs to my room, ignoring the queasy feeling my dad's handicap lift gave me every time I laid eyes upon it, and once I was inside my sanctuary of pale mint green walls and minimalist decor with splashes of forest green and golden accent pieces, I darted straight to my plush cloud soft comforter...

...and promptly jumped onto it, landing starfish directly into the center of it. I groaned into it with the vehemence with which I felt my frustration at my life.

I didn't have a terrible life, not by any means.

I was grateful that my father had had such an illustrious career, but the downhill spiral our lives had taken after the drunk driver had taken my mother and my dad's career from our family was the turning point.

My dad never wanted me too far away, and he was more than controlling. He was downright compulsive about me, about wanting and needing to know where I was and that I was safe.

With Jared, he had controlled our date nights, had never allowed us to be alone together, and while it all seemed reasonable considering we were still teenagers, I saw all of my other friends being able to go on unsupervised dates with their significant others, and it was disappointing that I wasn't allowed to do the same.

It was all different with Sara and Jared, since Sara was only my dad's niece and not his daughter, Kara made the rules for her, even though they'd been living with us long enough for my dad to be more of a dad to her than her actual father, who had little say in her life, regardless.