Winter in May

~2~ Cherry Bomb

Hello Daddy, Hello Mom,
I'm your ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb.
Hello world, I'm your wild girl.
I'm your ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb.

The Runaways ~ Cherry Bomb

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Clang clang clang, crash bang...BOOM!

I awake with a sudden start and immediately reach for the ol' ancestral baseball bat to start slaying my demons. But instead of battling my demons, I merely heave up out of bed and stumble down into the bathroom to start my morning. This sort of start to the day is sadly an all too common occurrence in the House of the Blazing Raisins, no thanks to the Irish Antichrist's eternal war with the Chinese kitchen demons. Her infernal war on silence has gotten to the point that I am actually almost used to this daily battle. 

Once into the bathroom, I strip down, turn on the shower, lean in to touch water...and water freezing cold. I seriously have to pee now, but instead, I hold my hand in the water and wait for warm. And I wait ...and wait ...and waiting ...and waited and still no warm water. 

Blaze me! The hot water heater must be jacked up again! So no shower before school. Blazing awesome sauce!

So with no hot shower to be had, I start to mull over my limited options. I figure if I can skate to school fast enough, maybe I can grab a quick shower in the gym lockers before homeroom? But one glance at my dive watch and no such luck. After waiting for water, I have barely enough time to grab something to eat and skate up the three streets to Hell. At this rate, I'll be lucky to make it to May before the late bells, and study buddies again. Whatever. 

So I do what I need to do in the bathroom, brush over my teeth, then slap on some extra deodorant for good measure. Pull on my jeans, grab an almost clean T-shirt out of the hamper, then stuff some clean clothes in my bag to change into after I shower in PE.

I wraith past the Irish Antichrist in the kitchen, exchange our standard morning farewell and go to Hell. Grab some coffee and couple pieces of soul charred toast on the way out the door. After a hard charge up the hill to Hell, I give a nod in passing at the Tower of Doom and hit the halls of Hell. Sliding down the long central hall to C-22, I slip right past the evil little gnome and I drop into my spot just as the final bells go off.

"Good morning, May?"I slide into my seat breathlessly.

"Cutting it a little close today, aren't we, Mr. Devil?" She smirks back, snapping her pocket watch closed.

"Oh yeah." I assure her of my heresy.

"Oh, and you ran all the way to school, didn't you?" She sniffs at me and crinkles her nose up. "And you didn't shower again, did you?"

"Naw not, the blazing hot water heater went on the fritz again this morning." I sigh and try to stink a little less. "But Aces swears for sure this is the last time. It's either getting fixed right this time, or we're putting in a new one on Saturday. So hopefully this will be the last time I show up fuming just for you."

"Hope is good..." May intones dryly. "...but soap is better."

"I swear to you, I will shower after PE and before lunch. Even if I have to stay the extra ten minutes to do it. So we will not have another moment, in which you inch as far away as you can down the lunch benches. All in order to get away from the bad boy smell."

"Well, I guess I can bear it until the bell." She sighs sarcastically.

"To wit, I brought you a present. If you would be so kind as to hold out your hand, please?" May immediately acquiesces to my request, and I gently place in her palm a tube of Cheery Cherry goodness.