How to Fall... Without Trying To (GirlxGIRL)

Adrianne

I sit in the chair of a wide circle, listening in on the stories of survivors. Domestic abuse survivors. Many of these stories I've heard before, but some of these faces are new. Some haven't returned and completed the program. I'm almost one of those survivors. I feel like mentally and physically, I am ready to move past him. He doesn't define me and he never will. Apparently it got out what he did, and his career started to plummet. Contracts started to pull away, he stopped giving interviews, and he started getting blacklisted for his actions. Good job to whoever did that one

"I can still feel his hands wrapped around my neck" Jodie, one of the new survivors, says to the group, "It wakes me up in my sleep"

I know how she feels, and I even tell her this with the nodding of my head. I stopped speaking of this outside of my therapist, because I felt that I healed better when I stopped speaking of it. I don't know. Today is my last day sleeping here, and I'm excited to get back to my life without having to look back at this portion of my life.

"Thank you for sharing, Jodie" the group leader, Kevin, tells her then encourages everyone else to do the same

"Thank you for sharing, Jodie" we all sat in unison, "This is a safe place"

After the meeting, we all help break down the room to turn it back into the TV room and then we separate to our own activities. I go to my room, packing the rest of my things up so I can leave tomorrow.

"Ready for freedom?" My roommate, Yali, walks into the room then sits down on their bed, "I can't wait for mine"

"You will get there" I tell them, sitting down on my bed, "Trust me, you are ready. You just need to be sure"

"Oh, I can feel that I'm preparing myself to leave" Yali smiles, "Fuck my ex!"

"Fuck my ex!" I smile.

Yali, is 19-years old and non-binary , and their ex would beat the hell out of them for stupid shit. When Yali got here, they were battered and bruised after having enough of the 2-year torture. When they put Yali with me, we made a pact not to let our exes ruin our lives any longer. We would tell each other, "fuck my ex", to give us back our power. So far it helped us to get through our time here.

"I'm gong to miss you" Yali frowns, "But I'll see you on the flip side?"

"Of course!" I smile, "Just hit me up when you get out. If you need a place to stay or anything? Let me know"

"I will" They smile, "Don't forget about me?"

"Of course not!" I laugh, "I can never forget the one person that kept me halfway sane in this place"

Yali smiles then

It's finally here. The day I'm leaving this place. I've been here for nearly 2 months, only allowed to leave for Queen's engagement, and now I'm finally free to go home. Yali helps me to bring my things to my car, closing the trunk and staring at me for a second

"You've been such a big help in my recovery" Yali tells me, "Thank you"

"Yali, this isn't good bye" I tell them, holding my arms open for a hug, "Come here"

Yali walks over to me, giving me a huge hug that lasts for almost a complete minute, "I'm going to miss you"

"I'm going to miss you too, Yali" I hold her tightly before releasing her, "Recover then come see me, okay?"

"Okay"She smiles.

I walk with her back inside the doors before I sign my phone and electronics from the front desk. The front desk lady, Gina, waves to me as I leave the building. Finally free. Finally recovered. I survived and I can finally say it out loud and in the open

"FUCK MY EX!" I yell at the top of my lungs, turning around to face the window of my old room in the facility. I see Yali cheering me on from the window, and I blow a kiss to them, "See you on the flip side!"

She claps her hands and smiles, waving me good bye as I get into my car and drive away.

When I get to my apartment, I look around at the mess that I left behind when I left. I start to pick everything up, turning my phone on and charging it in my room so that I can finally connect with the outside world again. I throw away anything that is broken and make a note to buy new furniture and replace the broken things in my home. So far I have to buy two tables, a mirror, my bathroom and bedroom doors, and my refrigerator. I honestly feel like I should sue for damages at this point, but if he fights it? The legal process will take forever and by then? I could have just done it myself. The fucker. At least my tv works, I shrug, turning it on and flipping through the channels. It's 5:30 p.m., surely something good has to be on. As I'm passing a few news stations, something catches my attention to make me go back. There was a hostage situation at--

"No" I breath, reading the rest of the tag line

'Two shot and killed in deadly hostage situation. The shooter, Rick Thomas, was taken into custody by police earlier today. Rick, who was disgruntled over a case he lost against the practitioner last week when he filed a lawsuit against one of their clients. Amongst the dead, Leslie Jaz Rodriguez and Jocelyn Marie SinClaudia" The news anchorwoman says, and my heart sinks to the floor.

"Leslie" I feel my chest pound and I run to my phone to see if I was texted with any news. I didn't tell the others I was getting out early, I wanted to surprise them, but there has to be something!

I check my phone to see over 3,000 texts in the AV's group chat then a few personal ones from my mother and family members wishing me a great recovery and to let them know when I am back home. I immediately call Aria to see if she heard the news

"I did" Aria chokes out, and I can tell she's crying, "I can't believe she's gone!"

"I can't either" I can feel the tears falling down my face, "I just got out today and I was planning on all of us getting together for dinner or something"

"That would have been great, I know we all missed you so much" Aria sniffles, "I just can't believe someone would do this to Leslie"

"I can't either"

"I called Queen and she is on her way over with Anissa" Aria tells me, "If you want, you can definitely come over"

"I will be there soon" I tell her, grabbing my keys

"Adrianne" Queen rushes over to me when I walk into Aria's living room, "You're back"

"I am" I nod, trying to keep the tears from falling, "We lost an AV today"

"We did" Queen starts to tremble, "And there was nothing we could have done to stop it"

I look around the room to see Kace and Anissa sitting down on the couch. Kace, rubbing Aria's back as she sobs on his shoulder. We're all here and we're all feeling the same pain. The loss of a friend is never easy, and it surely won't get any better.