Not tolerable enough to tempt me(Modern Pride and Prejudice)

Chapter 22

It has been 2 weeks since the diner incident. Lizzie has started to feel better about it all, though some thoughts were still lingering. She knew that a change of mind wouldn’t be instant, but she had hope that they would eventually fade away. 

She has managed to avoid Caroline at school although she knew that would not be permanent. Lizzie knew that as soon as Caroline heard about Will and her dating there would be trouble again, but now that William has reassured her she doesn’t let it affect her as much.

Speaking of Will, he has been much more protective of her as of late. It doesn’t really bother her because it just means that he cares about her and at the moment that is something Lizzie needs in her life. 

What Lizzie didn’t know was that William was more affected than he let on. He was obviously angry about what Caroline has done to Elizabeth, but it was more than that. He was sad that someone could hold such hatred for someone just because they weren’t getting what they wanted. He was also upset about what Lizzie told him about her mother. Didn’t she know what a treasure her daughter was. He couldn’t even guess how he would react if one of his parents was like that. Of course, he knew that he would eventually meet her because he had no notion of ever letting Lizzie go. If anything, this all had made him love her even more. She had shown how strong she could be and William admired even more for it. He was only slightly confused about why she hadn’t told about what was happening. It was clearly affecting her and she had hid it from him. He wasn’t mad at her. How could he be? She has gone through so much. He just wanted to know why she hadn’t told. He hadn’t had the courage these past to ask her, but he was determined to ask before her family got here.

Wait...they would be here tomorrow! 

And that is how Will got to be passing in front of Lizzie’s bedroom door. He knew that all he had to do was knock, but he was nervous. Mainly nervous for 2 reasons. One being that he didn’t want her to be mad at him. The second being he was scared for her answer as to why she didn’t tell him. 

What if she didn’t trust him? That would be the worst response in his opinion because he wanted Lizzie to be able to trust him enough that she could tell him anything and if he had done something to ruin that trust he didn’t know what he would do with himself.

During his mental panic, Elizabeth had opened the door and was surprised to find her boyfriend passing in front of her door. When the door was completely open, he noticed and ended his passing, facing her. She had a slight smile on her face until she saw the nervous look on his face. Fearing the worst, a frown grew on her face.

“Will, what’s the matter? Are you okay?”

She saw him take a deep breath before he spoke. “I need to speak to you about something Lizzie. Can we talk in your room?”

A feeling of dread started to build up inside her. What did he have to talk about? WHy did he look so nervous? Is he breaking up with her? Did he realize his mistake? Did he see that Caroline and her mother were right?

Her thoughts continued to spiral down as she led him to sit on her bed. 

Not noticing her distress, he started nervously. “Lizzie, I don’t really know how to say this. I just want to start off by saying I am sorry if this upsets you. That isn’t what I want and I really think we need to let everything off of our chests.” 

That is about as far as he got before Elizabeth couldn’t take it anymore and burst out crying. She didn’t really know what he was going to say before he started talking, but now that he had, she was sure that he was breaking up with her and that almost crushed her completely. Her sobbing caused Will to spring into action. He was confused as to why she was crying, but wanted to comfort her anyway he could.

He wrapped his arms around her and spoke in a soft, soothing voice. “Lizzie, ssh it's okay. What’s wrong? Please stop crying, it's breaking my heart.”

She slowly pulled away from him and tried to speak. Her voice was slightly choked with tears, but he managed to understand her. She tried to speak calmly, but there was a little bit of anger in her voice, as well as absolute hurt. “Just say what you have to say already. I know what it is and I know that it will shatter my heart so please just make it quick.” By the end, her voice was barely more than a whisper and she was having great difficulty keeping her tears at bay.

“You know what I want to say? If you do then why would that shatter your heart?”

“Do you really think that I would not be affected by that?! How on earth would I not? Just because you might not be heartbroken due to your recent revelation doesn’t mean I wouldn’t.”

At that he was confused. Why would she be heartbroken over him asking her a question about why she didn’t tell him. Also, what was this about a recent revelation? 

“Recent revelation? Lizzie, why don’t you just tell me what you think this is about so that we aren’t confused.”

“I don’t understand what you are confused about William because it was pretty obvious by your speech that you finally realised that what Caroline and my mother said were true and you can no longer be in a relationship with me and that’s fine. I promise not to bug you and if you want I can find somewhere else to stay. Charlotte might let me stay with her-”

That was how far she got before Will engulfed her in his arms and kissed her soundly. She let out a noise of surprise, but melted into his embrace. When they let eachother go, he leaned his forehead onto hers and spoke with a tone that Lizzie knew meant every word he said was true.

“Lizzie, I am so sorry if I made it seem like I was breaking up with you. That definitely was not my intention. I promise you Lizzie Bennet that I am just as much in love with you as I always have been. More in fact.”

Those words broke her for the second time. Only now it was from complete and utter relief. “Oh thank god.” She then wrapped her arms around him again and buried her face into his neck. He just held her close and consoled her. After a couple of minutes, she unwrapped herself and gave him a confused look.

“Wait, so if it wasn’t that, then what were you talking about? What could I possibly get upset about?”

He nervously scratched his head. “Well, I wanted to ask you this before your family comes tomorrow because I wanted to have this settled and done with, so I was going to ask you why you thought you couldn’t tell me about how you were feeling because of Caroline and everything else.”

Due to where her thoughts had gone before this, she found that this question was like a relief and she decided that she would answer it as honestly as possible.

“To be honest, I just really didn’t want to burden you with something that I thought I could handle on my own. You have a business to run and didn’t need my problems getting in the way of that. I was also worried that you would hear what Caroline had said and see truth in her words. Really, I was just scared. I knew I could trust you, but I didn’t have to burden you.”

“It wouldn’t have been a burden. If anything, I was more worried because I didn’t know what was wrong. You already know how I feel about your second point though, so I will just say that there could never be any conceivable way that I could think less of you based on a spiteful, spoiled woman who thinks of no one, but herself.”

“I know that now and I am sorry. I promise that I will talk to you in the future.”

“You don’t need to apologize Lizzie. I just wanted to make sure you know you can trust me.”

“I know and I do.”

They hugged again.

Trying to lighten the mood, Will said with a smile. “Well now that all of that is out of the way, are you excited for your sister and the Gardeners to come tomorrow?”

“Yes, I can’t wait.”

They stayed in her bedroom talking for the rest of the night, until they both fell asleep in each other’s arms.