The ketchum conference

Movie 12

Cynthia: "Okay, Bertha, what do you have for us?"
Bertha: "First, dear, I have this."
*slide change*

Lance: "...that's a mural on a stone wall. Why are you showing us what's basically one step above a cave painting?"
Cynthia: "Wait a moment - Lance, look!"
Lance: *looks closer* "...oh, you've got to be kidding me. That's Ash and his friends, isn't it."
Bruno: "What!? Why is he on a - but - how old is this?"
Bertha: "Several thousand years old, at least. It's even older than me, isn't that special?"
Flint: "Okay, what the hell is..."
Lance: "Bertha, if you would please explain? We don't need the act, either."
Bertha: "Oh, you're no fun, Lance. Right. Who knows about the Jewel of Life?"
*The Sinnoh-natives raise their hands, as do Will and Malva*
Cynthia: "That's the gem of Michina, isn't it? The one which legends say ensured it always had a pleasant, verdant climate? I've been there in winter, it's lovely."
Bertha: "It's made of five of the Plates of Arceus."

Alder: "What? Seriously?"
Bertha: "Yes, it is. According to legend, it was-"
Alder: "Oh, not another legend... is there one we haven't seen come true when Ash is around?"
Siebold: "I can think of a couple, but then again Ash is in my region right now..."
Cynthia: "With what we've learned today, I advise property damage insurance - and make sure it covers Act of Legendary."
Lance: "We may be off topic."
Bertha: "Right. According to legend, Arceus fell to earth after being hit by a meteorite."
Drake: "Dang lazy Rayquaza..."
Cynthia: *death stare*
Drake: "...sorry."
Bertha: "He was found, wounded, by a man called Damos, who lived in the old Michina. He brought Arceus one of his plates, and that revived the Creator enough for him to summon the rest of them."
Aaron: "Neat!"
Bertha: "Arceus was grateful, and gave Damos the Jewel of Life - formed from five of the Plates - as a gift."
Sidney: "Now that is an absolutely awesome payment."
Bertha: "Now, dears, here's where it gets confusing. I interviewed young Mr. Slate about this, and his story's different to the historical one."

Cynthia: "How does that - oh, wait, we just saw an ancient painting of Ash. Of course there's time travel."
Bertha: "Right. So, we'll start with when young Ash and his friends-"
Agatha: "We know, you're old, stop mentioning it!"
Bertha: "I'll do what I want, dearie. Now, they entered town, and they ran into space-time distortions. A girl called Sheena was able to communicate with Dialga to prevent their Pokemon from being sucked in, and then Giratina emerged too."
Grimsley: "I'm guessing Giratina recognized Ash?"
Bertha: "He most certainly did, you're right. Ash broke up a fight between Dialga and Giratina, and then Palkia showed up."
Cynthia: "The entire Space-Time Trio was there? What was going on?"
Bertha: "Spacial distortions. Sheena and her friend had been at both Alamos and the Giratina incident, and so they were able to put all that together to work out why those things happened - in part, it's because Arceus was awakening, so each thought the other had invaded their territory."
Lance: "That explains a lot."
Bertha: "I thought so too. As they explained to Ash and his friends, though, Arceus was angered when Damos refused to return the Jewel - the effort of exacting retribution tired Arceus out, which was why he'd been asleep for the past several thousand years."
Cynthia: "But... wait, hold on... I was there last year, and they-"
Bertha: "Told you it was strange. As they were told that, Arceus emerged into the air over Michina and began to attack - and when Sheena attempted to return the Jewel, it only made him angrier."

Lorelei: "Why would that make him angrier? I've always seen Arceus as compassionate... and, incidentally, female."
Bertha: "Mr. Slate heard Arceus speak, he said the voice was male."
Lorelei: "Fair enough."
Karen: "I am so freaked out by that conversation you two just had..."
Bertha: "Arceus said the Jewel she gave him was a fake, and decided to completely destroy Michina. Palkia and Dialga intervened, though - Palkia held off Arceus, and Dialga sent the whole group to the distant past."
Wikstrom: "Now I see where the murals came from."
Bertha: "Correct - they turned up at the moment of the betrayal, and saw that another man was controlling Damos."
Cynthia: "Controlling? You mean Hypnosis? But - Pokeballs hadn't been invented then!"
Bertha: "Some kind of strange armour was involved. Sheena managed to get Dialga to send them back a bit further, though."
Shauntal: "How? She wasn't in the same time as Dialga any more. That chain of events makes no sense!"
Alder: "I didn't know you had a doctrate in time travel, Shauntal - you'll have to show me sometime!"
Shauntal: *mutters*

Bertha: "They found Damos imprisoned by the other man - Marcus - and then everything got kind of complicated."
Cynthia: "Complicated?"
Bertha: "Marcus was lying to Sheena and got information from her, and Mr. Slate wasn't there for that - I don't have all the information. What I do know is that Marcus changed his plans and attacked Arceus directly. Ash got in a hand-to-hand fight with Marcus, made him drop the real Jewel of Life, and began to run to get the jewel back to Arceus - who, without five of his plates, was at serious risk of death from the attacks."
*several of the assembled Elites look a bit faint*

Steven: "I had suspected that's where this was going, but-"
Cynthia: "Wait, wait, wait. If Arceus died in the past, then... none of the last several thousand years of history would have happened the same."
Bertha: "Which is why Ash and his friends started to disappear as Arceus approached death."

*long silence*

Drasna: "I am unable to... this is not something I can process properly. Sorry."
Bertha: "Fortunately, the Jewel reached Arceus just in time and he was able to reabsorb it - returning to full health. He then sent everyone back to their proper time. Once there, they found Arceus having defeated all three of the Creation Trio."
Cynthia: "..."
Bertha: "Ash called out to Arceus to remember what happened in the past, and at that point the past caught up to the present and fixed the damage - which now never happened. Everything resolved, the four creators of various kinds returned to their homes."
Cynthia: "...what..."
Lance: "Cynthia? Are you okay?"
Cynthia: "Lance, I just learned that most of the last four thousand years unhappened less than two years ago, and then rehappened! If you're okay with that you don't understand it!"
Bertha: "Rehappened different, dear. The version in the history books and murals was of Arceus casting down the traitor Marcus with the help of a brave young man and his thunder beast."
Malva: *drops glass* "That was HIM!? I loved that story growing up!"
Cynthia: "I think we might need a recess before we get to my one just to calm down..."
Lance: "I'd rather not, we've taken a while already. So - to summarize... Ash went back in time thanks to Dialga and Palkia, changed history on a grand scale and befriended the Creator of the Universe."
Bertha: "Basically."
Marshal: "I think I need a drink..."
Alder: "Like hell I'm letting you have a drink, you're handling one of these incidents! If I have to be sober so do you!"

(...the time-travel stuff in Jewel of Life is very hard to keep track of. Hopefully this makes as much sense as can be achieved.)