Chapter 3

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It wasn't a secret that I aced every studies in school except of course, maths. I was hated for it. They make me sit alone in every single part of the school. I was friendless and I honestly didn't mind the solitary, maybe even found solace in it sometimes. 

Some bullied me, some let me be, few acknowledged me without beating me up.

When I dashed out of that class and to second period, I suspected that fate might've held some old grudges against me and synced the new kid's schedule with mine. Of course he chose the seat beside me; again. He bugged me the whole class and thankfully after those dreadful two long periods, I was finally free from the continuous word vomit that came from him.

The day dragged on until lunch eventually came around and like every other day, the bullying began. 

"Yo bitch! Why don't you get that fat, ugly ass somewhere else? Preferably off a damn cliff?" Someone, probably a jock, shouted from behind me. Instead of turning around and backhanding him, I chose to play my part as the nerd and ducked my head, staying as quiet as mouse. 

"How about you shut up and get a life?!" An annoyingly familiar voice yelled back. I'm pretty sure that wasn't directed at me since I haven't said a peep since I escaped the new boy's presence during second period.

I kept my head down even though a set of footsteps fell right beside me. I immediately recognized his shoes from the amount of time I stared at them during second period.

"Why are you defending me? Shut up!" I silently hissed at the new guy, still casting my gaze on the floor. As if to answer my question slash demand, a voice cut in and my arm was grabbed from someone behind me. Manicured nails dug into the skin of my forearm as I was dragged away from the new boy. "What the hell do you think you're doing, clinging to him?!"

I stayed silent, hoping she took it as me being completely petrified. Although the truth was that the sting from having her nails dig into my arm is just building up to my annoyance and I didn't want to risk snapping at her. 

"Are you ignoring me, bitch?!" She screeched out, causing my ears to ring from her inhumane shrill voice. Oh goody, she doesn't think I'm scared. 

This time I tried to make a small whimper to try and avoid angering her any further. I've had enough problems to keep myself busy for a life time, I don't need to start piling dramas left and right. I gagged at myself for my pathetic attempt to make myself look weak. Such a disgrace.

Slap

"That'll teach you a lesson."

I reined my conscience in and without my acknowledgement, my fingers curled up on their own accord and my hands trembled as I tried to hold in the urge to beat the living shit out of her. "That's enough Maddison!"

Shut up, dude. Just shut up.

He didn't get the message and kept going. "That was over the line! You can't go around slapping people!" He's making a scene. My inner self taunted in a sing song voice. I'm not blind, bro. I ain't blind.

As Maddison turned to look at him, I took that chance and scurried out of there. As I ran, I could hear Maddison's screams that was probably a result of something that the new kid said. "No! You do not defend her! She's an outcast! She doesn't belong and she deserved whatever is thrown at her!"

I shook my head as the last sentence tried to worm its way into my thoughts. I'm not going to breakdown here. Anywhere but here. 

I kept running until I reached the school's backyard and took a seat on one of the beat up benches. I set my face in my hands as I dug the heels of my palm against my closed eyes. That last statement hit a nail but I refuse to show any further weakness than what is necessary.

My eyesight blurred as I lost my focus and started drifting off to those times where I would argue with the hot-headed guy every morning on who gets more waffle than the other. I guess the stubborn trait runs in the family. 

Without me realizing, a small, weak smile crept onto my face and I felt my eyes water as reality came crashing in once more and ruined the beautiful memory like it always does. I will never be able to make those memories or relive it in anyway ever again. Not when the guy I made those memories with is gone. 

I miss his smile, his laughter and the way he'd tease me when I spend too much time on my phone.

"What was she talking about when she said that you deserved everything that was thrown your way?" I sighed and as per usual, kept my head down letting my hair fall over my face, acting as a curtain and pretended that it has the power of being a barrier between me and the cruel world. Why won't he just leave me alone.

"Nothing, she's just-" I started before cutting myself off. I didn't know what to say. Drowning in hate? Jealous? Out to get me because I'm the reason her ex died in a car crash? 

Maddison used to be a sweet girl, she dated my brother and we were close friends once. Then that faithless night occurred and she lost all of those traits, engulfed by her own grief and loss. She blames me and I can't even hate her for it. 

Even I hate myself, why would she show any other emotion towards a murderer like me? There are a lot of words that you can use to describe Maddison but once you know the reason behind how she became so heartless, nothing seemed to be suiting.

"She's just..?" Adam trailed off as he pried further.

"Nothing, forget it." I shook my head, using a clipped tone in hopes he catches on and drops the subject. I could tell he was giving me a funny look but he lets it drop. 

"So.. You seemed awfully alone." He stated, trying to fill the awkward silence between us. 

"Yeah, you don't get much friends when you're hated by the queen bee around here. That's probably why it's wise that you leave me be and run along. Go huddle with the popular people. Don't give me that look, I know they've offered you to be in their clique by now."

He seemed stunned at how quick the conversation took a turn but I didn't raise my head up. "Well, I'd say it was nice talking to you but then I'd be lying." I said trying to sound as hostile s I could while I stood up and held my breath until he was out of earshot before releasing it. 

I was tempted to look back but swiftly whacked myself mentally. Why would you want to look? 

Don't get attached, Cassandra. I chided myself

I squashed every tiny sprout of hope of someone seeing past my cold front and catching a glimpse of the little girl inside of me that was screaming for help. I continued walking away from the new guy and entered the building with an emotionless face.

As far as everyone knew, that little girl was gone and in her place, I was born. The twinkle of mischief that people would usually find when they look into my eyes have diminished the night I  saw the mangled body of my beloved brother.

I briefly squeezed my eyes shut as the painful memory passed through my mind.

His head was bleeding, probably split open. His right leg was set in an odd angle and his arm had a nasty gash on it, my best guess was from the shards of glass but I couldn't be sure. I watched his limp form being placed gently on a stretcher and a mask being placed over his face. I remember how cold the night had felt, how the goosebumps travelled throughout my entire being and how that chill ran down my spine. It was as if my conscience knew that he wasn't going to make it, no matter how much I didn't want to believe it.

Last but not least, I remembered the only thought that circled my mind as I watched the medic whisking him away. 

"He's on that stretcher because of me. I murdered my brother." It should've been me. I should be the one on that stretcher, unconscious. I was the one who was supposed to be dead. Bryant's didn't deserve to die.

I sucked in a breath, trying to calm the bundle of nerves and the thoughts that were racing in my head. When I was sure I was nowhere near the brink of breaking down, I braced myself for what's to come once I stepped foot into the building.

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