TASTE OF FREEDOM - AZRIEL'S MATE (ACOTAR)

Chapter 8: The past

Trying to control her shaking legs, Raven arrived at the House of Wind's library where Amren was waiting for her. She didn't plan to get there almost late, but she was so nervous that she made a mess and dropped over 20 cups of tea.

Raven couldn't ask for some of the priestesses to clean everything, so by the time she got to the library's door, she was almost panicking. It wasn't because of Amren... Well, at least not all of it.

It was because she didn't want to find out what was underneath her. Her hand knocked twice on the door, not wanting to be rude. All of them always were so nice to her, so Raven was feeling like she was asking for too much.

Rhys arranged everything. He was fast and impeccable, the only thing he asked her to do was to tell Clotho the time Amren and her were meeting five times a week. All Raven heard was what sounded like an order for her to come in.

Amren was sitting behind a big table with an empty seat in front of her. Raven tried to smile, but she was pretty sure that it came out as a grimace.

"Sorry to not be here earlier, but I made a mess at the refectory and it was horrible..."

And there was Raven, rambling on until she saw Amren's grin. She put her hands in her robe pockets to stop herself from waving them everywhere like she always does when nervous.

"It's okay, Raven. I just got here too" there was a hint of humor in Amren's voice, but Raven sighed silently. "Today we're just gonna talk for a while, so you may sit..."

Raven tried to sit on the chair, but didn't know how to rest her arms, so she looked at Amren, trying to hide her anxiety. Her short hair was perfect and she was so small and beautiful, even with that intriguing look on her silver eyes.

"I can't deny to feel a little pleased to notice, and smell, your anxiety, but I'm obliged to say you don't need to be if the reason it's me" her grin was still there and she didn't even hide it. Raven tried to take deep breaths quietly.

"You're very intimidating, to be honest, but" Raven's blue eyes landed on Amren's silver ones "You don't make me anxious... Well, actually not much more than others".

The Second-in-command was interested in that female. Raven had something different that Amren had never seen before.

"I actually don't..." it was difficult to put into words. Raven never talked about what she was feeling without lying or trying to change the subject, but she knew it didn't make anything better. And also, Amren was there, giving her time trying to help. "The reason is... I'm scared to find out what it is".

She didn't have to even finish talking to make Amren understand. Raven saw her to put on a more serious face.

"Do you mind if I ask you some questions?"

_______

When Raven first met Amren, she had just arrived in Velaris. Still not fully understanding what all the things that happen in the last days meant in her life. Mantic was dead. Rhysand made sure of it, but nothing she was living seemed real to her.

The older female was told, by Rhysand, everything about Raven that day. Amren just listened to it quietly while the other kept staring at the carpet the whole time, still traumatized.

On that day, she thought Raven would take centuries to recover or just to be able to get outside the library, but Amren was wrong. She knew that when the female came to dinner at the River House.

Amren could almost feel all the traumas Raven still had, but she was dealing with them, one at the time. Her social skills weren't natural and she still had that look on her face.