Older Brothers

57

Everything was blurry. The noise was muffled. A beat was thumping. My heart was racing.

My eyes strained as I tried to bring my vision into focus. Where was I? People were everywhere. Nothing was familiar.

"Khloe." I heard someone say to me.

I looked up at the voice. It was distant like someone was trying to wake me up from a dream. I wasn't dreaming. I knew I was awake, but I didn't know what was going on.

"Khloe, look at me." The voice persisted.

So familiar. It was soft. They spoke kindly to me. I wasn't used to that. People usually hated talking to me. I'm a bitch.

"Come on, you've got to look at me." The voice continued.

My head rolled over in their direction and I tried to concentrate my vision on trying to make out their face. It was only blurry. Unfamiliar.

Where was I?

"What the fuck have you done this time?" The person sighed.

My eyes drifted upwards and I tried to look at them. Blonde hair. Soft blue eyes. Faintly tanned skin.

"Charlie?" I whispered, scared I'd got the wrong person.

My mind was spinning.

"Yes, Khlo. It's me, I'm here." He said.

I felt him grab a hold of my hands and tried to pull me up. I shut my eyes in pain as the room spun out of control around me. Couldn't I be left alone?

"What's happened to you?" Charlie asked me.

I felt a strand of hair get tucked behind my ear as I was pulled up to stand in front of him. How had I got so drunk?

"I'm not sure." I replied.

"Khloe, I've literally found you passed out on the bathroom floor at our brother's party. You're not even supposed to be here. I'm not supposed to be here."

I shrugged, barely remembering what I'd even done tonight.

Charlie sighed, "you've really gotten yourself into a state tonight. You can't keep doing this. This is the worse I've seen you. It can't get any worse, Khloe. If the other's see you or us we're fucked. I can't keep covering for you and I'm not going to continue covering for you." Charlie threatened.

I pulled away from him and began cackling. I guess I was mean drunk too.

"Are you trying to scare me?"
I slurred. I sounded like some drunk person rambling on, but I didn't care. I heard what he said and he deserved to know what I think about it. "Do it, Charlie. See if I care. I don't care about them or you or anyone. You act like you're so loyal to me and you tell me you cover for me like you take my side all the damn time, but I know how you really feel about me.
You can't stand me.
You can't stand the person I've grown into."

Charlie stepped away from me and shook his head. "Grown into? Khloe? Are you fucking serious? You haven't grown into anything. You pretend to be this person and you're just not her. You're not the person you make yourself out to be."

"Yeah, well people surprise you." I snarled. "Charlie are you seriously holding onto the girl I used to be? She was pathetic, lame and about ten pounds heavier. Look at who I am now. I'm popular, I have plans every weekend and I look the better than I ever have before."

"Those things aren't everything Khloe. They mean shit. And they aren't you."

I scoffed and stumbled away from him. "You don't even know who I am anymore, Charlie. You just judge me and think I'm playing a part. I'm not. This is me, it's who I want to be."