Walking the Right Path

Chapter 7

No one ever ponders on why a person turns bad, rotten, mischievous, thorn in the flesh and all sorts of negative attributes. They only see this person lost in the negativity of his ways and are quick to jump into hate speech and most often than not use insulting words. No, they don't sit to wonder why? And though some think they do, they actually don't. It only comes to them when it affects them personally and then they begin to wonder perhaps this or that. The answer never comes, they'll say "who knows what ever goes on in their minds." They never really think about it for long, only for a moment and their lives go on. Why bother, right?

I was in such a position in middle school. I remember being bullied and always hiding in any corner I could find and during those times I asked myself why those people were like that. My simple mind expected everyone to conform to the right ways and I felt sad, praying that God would help me and them. And as I grew I saw that nobody really cared about what those bad people did to me. In their world they were just that-a bunch of notorious boys at school but to me I wanted to know why because I felt the brunt of it.

I guess the point is no one cares or more rightly cares enough. No one cares enough. Not enough to try, not enough to ask, not enough to think deeper. They just settled for it's what it is.

Tobias and his friends frequented this little diner where everyone from the local highschool gathered in the evenings from six o'clock. He and his friends knew a couple of senior guys from the school and I'd heard Sammy say that they used to attend but dropped out after certain incidents. I could see people sitting at other tables sneak glances at us, make a disgusting or judgemental face then turn back to whisper rapidly to their friends. It was followed by discreet pointings and vigorous head shaking.

After watching them for what felt like hours I started to really think about the whole concept of caring about the bad guys. What did they know? Nothing, that's what.

But so do you. A voice said.

At least I know enough. I know that Michael's Father died when he was four and his mother had been sacked from work so in a desperate attempt to make money she became a prostitute. When she thought Micheal was sound asleep she would sneak out at night to go stand by the nearest pub. Little Michael was so clueless, he wanted to know where mommy went after tucking him into bed at night. Unfortunately for him he got his answer but what did that cost him? His childhood and a spiral down into darkness. He had nobody who actually cared for his well being at the time to help ease his burdens so he turned to other things.

And what of Tyrone? His whole life was spent trying to please the people around him that he just snapped. He was fed up with being the perfect little boy to everyone that he wanted to know what it felt like to not be so perfect.

And so the stories go on and on about each of the guys surrounding me. One thing I noticed is they all started out good, at least at some point. Fifty seven percent of them used to be avid church goers and all that. How come it wasn't enough to actually...save them or stop them from going the wrong path? My guess is it's a part of the inevitable, hence what's the point.

I wanted to scoff.

"What are you thinking about all the time, Daniel?" Spencer asked, chuckling as he gulped a full glass of beer.

"He's probably daydreaming about Penelope," Carlos said in a singsong voice as if I was starstruck.

"Shut up," I said. My eyes immediately turned back to the boys in front of me and I was surprised how easy it was for me to feel comfortable amongst them. I felt understood in an odd sense and these types of guys were never my usual crowd.

"What? Don't think we haven't noticed you sneaking glances," Micheal teased, the rest of the guys laughed along with him.

Penelope. I've seen her a few times working at the diner. The boys seemed to like her, whenever she got to their table to serve them it was followed by boisterous cheers. She never minded them though. That unfazed and bored look was permanently etched on her face. I only saw her laugh once with one of her workers and it felt warm. Whenever her shift was up or she had a break, she snuck to the back and we never saw her until the next day.