Our Ordinary Lives

Talking About Ai (Author)

Hello again! The author here. Unfortunately, Chapter 12 isn't ready yet. But on a positive note, the writing process has been smoother than before. I wanted to take a moment to discuss the whole story. Don't worry, I'm not canceling it – I find it crazy how much I've written in such a short time. Thanks to everyone who reads and supports me – your encouragement means a lot.

Let's talk about Ai Hoshino's character in my fic. Most readers probably have a basic understanding of her character from the manga and anime. She comes across as positive, always smiling, full of energy. That's who I've been writing – a good-hearted person with some insecurities. But I've realized I might have misrepresented her.

I followed a common archetype – a normal girl with flaws. Looking back, that was my biggest mistake. The story's structure diluted Ai's complexity. This can happen in crossover fanfics like this, where characters are forced into roles that don't match their essence. Ai isn't just insecure; she's also self-deprecating and even somewhat resentful of those she tries to please, given her past of childhood abuse. She is an extremely complex charecter who feels conflicted on the inside and genuinely wants to feel love for herself. She is scared to truly express herself as she fears that it might damage her reputation. I didn't fully grasp her character due to limited information, but my recent analysis showed my portrayal fell short.

My writing has simplified her, making her less interesting. I sensed something was off in Chapter 12, where Ai takes the spotlight. She doesn't feel like Ai anymore; she's my interpretation of her. The fic seems more like a COTE story with Oshi no Ko characters, not a genuine crossover.

I aimed to capture Ai's essence, but I've changed her too much. Unlike Kiyotaka, I knew less about her when I started. I should have done more research – a big regret.

That's why Ai hasn't appeared much in the beginning. Adapting her and making her interact was harder than I thought. And COTE's setup isn't great for adding new characters.

I'm not used to this genre, and I'm often unhappy when I reread my work. Pacing, tone – something always feels wrong. It's probably me being too critical.

I also feel like I'm trying to do too much at once at the beginning. I've set up Ichinose, Horikita, and Sakura as charecters that I do plan to use but it is most definetly overwhelming. I want them to be in the story enough that they are important and not disregarded as plot devices and background charecters. I have plans made for all of them and their developments but I never realised the scale which I was planning.

In the end this is a passion project, born from frustration with badly written fics. I've been fueled by this for weeks, and I'm proud of how far I've come. You might have noticed references to other media – that's been enjoyable.

Enough rambling. I need your input. Should I adjust Ai's character to fit better, or keep it as is? I'm also considering adding more Oshi no Ko characters like Aqua, Ruby, Kana, Akane, but that's a big commitment. I actually do have a plan for this fic long term and I have story boarded most of it already and I have plans for all these charecters, but I feel as if I might have to slightly alter these plans. I've mapped it out so I can cover most to all events that happen in year 1-2 and those other charecters would appear much later on than where we are now. (probably around a year of writing later :p) I want a comprehensive fic and took inspiration from other great fics on Wattpad such as "The Girl Next Door," "The Odd One Out," and "Kiyotaka of Class B (Year 1 and 2)" on Wattpad. I believe they exemplify exceptional writing for both COTE and Oshi no Ko characters. I think authors did a great why of writing their charecters in a unique and complex way which I hope I can achieve.

Oh and I realised that I might a slight fuck up with the fact that Ai's name would have been listed with everyone elses in the mock exam. I'll just chalk that up to people being too focused on themselves to notices Ai's name.

Sorry for the long message. Back to regular updates. Expect Chapter 12 in 1-2 days, maybe even today if I push hard.