WIFI ; S . ITOSHI

;; CHIBI MARUKO CHAN

"Why is Sae mad at me.." I say dejected, before Bachira can speak I reply for him "It's already been like a week!" I say over the phone speaker. Bachira sighs over the speaker and loudly says "How would I know?"

'Of course he's not much help!' I think, still annoyed and confused.

"I'm gonna go talk to him! He needs to stop hiding!" I loudly proclaim, a little too confidently.

Without another word I hang up on Bachira, he wasn't helping anyway.

Quickly I put on some socks and shoes and pick up the Chibi Maruko chan plushy by my bed as a peace offering and run to Sae's apartment, it wasn't so far, Sae wasn't so far.

I hold the plushy in my arms and click the door bell a few times, to no response.

'Is he not home?' 'Shouldn't he be home from practice?' I decide to wait around a little longer, maybe he'll respond?

'It's already been 10 minutes, maybe he's just late I'll leave this here for now.' I set down the plushy on the doormat before walking to my apartment.

I lay on my bed lazily, probably overthinking about Sae or something.

I get up and slightly open my door to see if Sae took the plushy or not.

Of course, it's still there, it's still there but Sae isn't.

"Maybe he's just busy, it'll be okay!" I speak to myself trying to reassure myself.

I lay on my bed waiting to fall asleep, it seems like i'm too stuck on this.

After laying for a little too long I doze off.

Once I wake up I look for a text from Sae on my phone, nothing.

I rub my eyes trying to see something I can't, sadly it's the same screen no texts from Sae.

I hug my pillow, maybe I'll get a text.

By the time I know it, it's been 10 minutes of me looking at my phone waiting for someone who won't come.

I get ready for the day, there isn't any point in waiting for someone who won't come, right?

All I can think about is Him, so much so that I can't even remember what I'm doing today.

Am I even doing anything? Is anyone waiting for me? No, I already know the answer to that question.

No, no one is waiting for me. No one has time to hang out with me or talk to me.

Not Bachira, or even Sae. No one has time for me.

There's nothing to do and no one to do it with me, now that I'm facing my reality it really sucks.

I look down at my clothes,

who am I changing for ?

What am I changing for  ?

Who is waiting for me ?

I ask myself, while dropping to my bed.

I hate being alone, I miss everyone.

Sometimes I think about who 'everyone' is, who is in my life that makes me happy? To think about it.. I don't know. Mom? Dad? No, Bachira? Sae? No probably not.

Who is waiting for me? Who am I waiting for?

Honestly, for a while I thought it was Sae. Really I thought it was Sae who was waiting for me.

That was just a delusion though, it's clear I'm the only one who's waiting for him.

Constantly waiting on others has become routine, I shouldn't be surprised. I've never been good at waiting on others though.

I've always been easily swayed anyway, I should have expected it.

It's my consequence for my naivety.

Sometimes I'll reassure myself to make it feel better, I know I won't feel better in the end though.

Maybe sometimes I catch myself thinking about why he left so suddenly, still I don't know I wanna fix it. I really do.

I guess, him leaving has me wondering who else will stay. Then, when I think about it. Who do I really have? Bachira? No, I don't think he'd leave.

Sometimes I say "Who else?" and honestly, I don't know. Who else do I even have?

Now I really think about it, it's just.. I don't know.

This sucks, all I can ever do is pity myself until someone comes to help me.

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AUTHORS NOTE
she's such a loser lol
this chapter is SO cringe may delete
did u guys miss me ?!?!
^_^