cigarette smoke | jamie drysdale

Chapter Five

"So I'm going to see you in two days right?" Jamie asked, he was just about to leave for New Jersey for the Stadium Series game against the Devils. 

"Yeah, I'll be there." I replied. I was oddly really nervous about it. I don't know if I was more nervous about being there and wearing that sweater, or meeting quite literally everyone, or if it was about the sleeping arrangements that the girls had mentioned time and time again. 

"Are you sure you want to come? You don't seem too excited about it?" He asked, resting his hands gently on my hips.

"Yeah, I'm positive, I'm just a little nervous." I told him, now resting my hands on the inside of his elbows. 

"What are you nervous about?" He asked.

"Meeting everyone. I know I've met the girls, but no one else, and I don't even think all of the girls have been there when I was those couple times, but I don't know. What if they don't like me?" I asked him, my words just flowing one after the other, starting to ramble on. 

"They're going to like you, not to mention it doesn't matter if they like you or not. I like you." He said. That's the first time either one of us have used one of the L words. 

"Really?" I asked, finally only now looking him in the eyes. I let a small smile come through, and all the breath from my lungs let out. He quite literally took my breath away. 

"Yeah, you're amazing." He said, smiles all around. 

"You're amazing." I returned. 

"Well, then, we're going to be perfect together some day." He said. Some day? 

"Can I ask you something?" 

"Of course." He replied.

"Are you seeing anyone else? Like, are you hooking up with anyone else, or going on any dates with anyone else? Not that there's anything wrong with that, I just haven't and honestly that's not something I want to get into. If you're going to see me, I'd rather it just be me because,-"

"Stop, stop right there. Bella, I am not seeing anyone else. I'm seeing you. I don't want to put any labels on anything because we're not moving fast, we're dating, we're not boyfriend-girlfriend level yet. I'm okay with moving slow, I can wait until you're ready. I don't want to rush you, you said a couple weeks ago that you don't want to rush into anything and I respect that because I respect you. I'm waiting, I'm going to continue to wait for you until you're ready to make that step." He had a soft smile, a comforting smile. 

"I'm worth all that?" I asked.

"You're worth more than that. I will wait 10 years for you if that's what you need. But, I won't watch you go off be with some other guy who won't treat you as well as I can and would. I won't watch you go hook up with random guys because you just feel like it. If you need a random hook up, you call me." He said, letting out a small laugh again. "Now, breathe. Let it out. Calm your nerves." I did as he said, letting out a long and deep breath that I barely even realized I had been holding in. 

"I'll wait for you as long as you need." I said.

"I'm ready whenever you are. You don't need to wait for me for nothing because I'm here, ready willing and able." He paused for a second, looking me in the eyes, searching for something. "Come here." He whispered, voice low. He moved his arms from my hips and slid them around my waist, pulling me close to him and resting his chin atop my head. He felt like home, not some far away home that I have to fly to or drive 12 hours to, home that I can have here. A home in Philadelphia that I've only ever felt a few times before. 

"I'll be ready soon." I whispered, barely above silent, I wasn't even sure he heard me until I could feel his chest vibrating.

"Take your time, sweet girl." He whispered. "I hate to do this, but I really have to go." He said after a couple minutes of just standing in each others arms. This was my new favourite place, and I didn't want him to let go, I didn't want to let him go. The feel of his skin on mine, his minty breath mixing with mine. He was slowly turning into everything.