Crazy Stories, Random Rants and Awesome Things About Me

Part 3 Addictions Continued

ha ha ha... I'm listening to A7X... ;D  I <3 them!!

and this part is all about my gay boys/sex talk addiction =D

SHOUTOUT TO... KENTATSTIC101... because he needs to fulfill his wish list and I am awesome like that!!

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Part 3 Addictions Continued

Talking about sex

Well… I talk about sex ALL of the time… I can’t help it, it just shoots out of my mouth. Almost every comment I make can be taken in a sexual way… sorry… most of the time it is unintentional! But obviously very funny! Like the other day… I was listening to the radio and the song Glycerine by Bush came on, which coincidently… I have a HUGE crush on Gavin Rossdale and named my first born after his AWESOMENESS… but whatever… so not the point… so that song came on the radio and I shouted this…

‘OH MY GOD!! I LOVE BUSH!!’

My hubby and 14 year old son **Gavin… named after the sexy lead singer of Bush** immediately started laughing as did I when I realized what they were thinking… Come on… it isn’t like you weren’t laughing your ass off and thinking the same damn thing!! I think I have a problem… I wonder if there is a name for this affliction. I should look it up on the net… but then I would just get distracted and start trolling for more sexy ass abs so…  yeah… I’m steering clear and exercising some control! Perhaps sex-o-talk-aholic… not the best name but what the fuck ever… make one up for me then…

I have a super funny story about sex actually… not actual sex… but it’s sex related… wanna hear it?? I know you do!! It is embarrassing… well, not for me it isn’t… but for my poor hubby…

I’m gonna tell you anyway… because I’m awesome like that!! I know my Fluffy Twin knows what is coming… because I told her this story the other day & she agrees it was funny as hell!

OK... true story from 3 days ago... kind of gross & creepy... but also kind of funny...

My hubby was on the couch playing Xbox & since he got no loving on father’s day because I was so damned busy writing naughty 3boy sex scenes… which he was not happy about by the way… I decided to climb in his lap, & accidentally rubbed his sac with my leg...  he nearly screamed at me... the convo went like this... oh, btw... I thought my kids were all in bed...

Hubby: hey, be careful my right one hurts

Me: why, what happened?

H: dont know... been hurting half the day

M: when was the last time you jerked it? maybe your backed up…

H: a few days, but that’s not it. it hurts and feels swollen... will you look at it?

I loosen his pants & pull down the front... I see no difference, looks the same as always...

So I grab his sac in my hand and feel around a bit

M: Damn, it's huge! what the hell happened!?!

H: I said I don't know.

I feel the left nut for comparison...

M: thats like 4 times the size of the other one holy shit you should go see the dr

H: I’m not going now its nighttime

M: well so you better go tomorrow before your balls fall off cause that shit ain’t right

I feel around again as he winces a bit...then I use my fingers to measure the size difference...