Zombies Vs Aliens: Respawn

*Special Edition* Fred In Rotterland

***Sorta Spoilers ahead. This story takes place in the Chew Universe by CocoNichole, which includes one short story and three volumes of work. Needless to say, there are elements below which are mentioned throughout the work :D***

"Go gather firewood, Fred, go get water, Fred, shine my boots, Fred," he said in a high pitched falsetto. It wasn't a very accurate portrayal of his current pain in the ass, but he couldn't really mimic a voice that gargled rocks and whiskey for breakfast.

"Stupid J.D.," Fred grumbled, kicking a softball sized rock. Sometimes he forgot his own strength, specially now in his current condition. The rock ricocheted off a nearby tree and socked him in the gut with enough force to lift him off his feet and knock him flat on his back. He stared up at the overcast sky, grateful for the small things, like the fact he'd gone off to scrounge for firewood on his own and no one was around to see this.

Honestly, he'd been gone for a while. He was surprised no one came looking for him. No, no he wasn't.

It used to be him and Li against the world. Now she had all this other shit to worry about. Not that he could blame her, but really, did they need J.D.? Fred sighed, beginning to pick himself off the ground when his hand fell through the dirt.

Fell through, like there was nothing underneath him.

"What the-Gaaaaaaaah!" He screamed as he pitched backward, falling through a thin crust of dirt into nothingness. His scream went higher, straight into eight year old girl territory as he flipped end over end, flailing blindly in the abyss.

Light appeared below him, swirling up fast, way to fast. Good thing I can't puke, he thought, a second before he fell into the light. He blinked, adjusting his vision, and immediately wished he hadn't. He was still falling, this time toward snow covered ground. The towering tops of firs and pines reached for him, growing closer by the second. He grasped for them, feeling the scrape of bark over his skin. The acceleration of his fall caused him to rip the branches down with him. He flapped his arms in an attempt to slow his descent. A particularly thick branch sent him reeling sideways with a solid smack into the tree trunk, face first, arms and legs clinging around the trunk for dear life.

He let his equilibrium settle for a moment, telling the tree what a beautiful creature it was, before peering down. Fred was four feet off the ground. Sighing, he slid down, a little wobbly on his feet as he took in his surroundings.

Where the hell was he and how the hell had he gotten here? There didn't seem to be much in the way of scenery other than a butt ton of snow, his snuggle buddy trees, and that dead guy stumbling toward him.

Fred did a double take, cocking his head at the zombie. It was making headway through the knee deep snow drifts, unmistakably forging a crooked path in his direction. Curious, Fred took a step toward it. It wasn't like he had anything to fear from a fellow zombie. Not like it could do much to him, though it was rather...fresh looking compared to most corpses he stumbled across. He expected to see this kind of slow decay in the city zombies, who clustered together like a rotting bee hive, not in a zombie out in bum fuck nowhere.

That was when it got weird.

The approaching zombie paused, tilting to the side. Fred felt something fuzz about inside his head, like a voice crackling through a bad intercom.

Play?

"Bwah?" said Fred. The zombie dropped to all fours, galloping toward him. He backed against the tree, wondering if the dead dude was going to try and gnaw on him after all when it leapt on him. It pawed at his chest, a ropy trail of drool adding to the myriad of stains on his torn up t-shirt. Holy heaven, that stink. Fred closed his mouth, the stink so thick he could taste it on the back of his throat. Not that inhaling through his nose was so great. The zombie didn't attack him, just stared him at him expectantly with black gooey looking eyes. Ugh.