My Darling, My Dear

"Pain"

I awoke in the middle of the night to a churning stomach. I jumped out of bed and woke up Cullen in the process of getting to the bathroom. I threw up. I threw up until there was nothing left to throw up. Cullen tried to help me, but there was nothing he could do, so instead, he just held my hair, and rubbed my back.

"Bleckkk. Bleckkk." I coughed and coughed and was struggling to get some air. Another wave of nausea hit me like a ton of bricks. "Maker help me!" I screamed as I went into another coughing fit. Though I couldn't hear him, I knew he was crying. He always did. He hated not being able to do anything, not being able to help with the nausea.

"Go gettt Bleckkk the healers!" I said and Cullen anxiously ran down the stairs to the courtyard where he hoped to find the healers. I was left alone, taking a moment to breathe before the next wave hit. I hated this, always having to rely on someone or something else to heal me, and make the pain go away. The baby was a joy and a blessing, but the morning sickness in the middle of the night, the constant cramps and craving old elven foods the skyhold cooks don't know how to make. It was almost more than I could bear.

"Maker take me." I mumbled as I felt another wave of nausea overtake me.

I heard the healers and Cullen come in and the healers said, "She just has to ride it out. Have her drink lots of water and give her a regeneration potion. She should be fine." The nausea finally stopped, and calm came back to my stomach.

"Come, come to me." Cullen whispered. I stood and walked on unsteady legs to him. He embraced me, and kissed me on my forehead.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"You have nothing to apologize for. I should apologize to you. I did this. I'm sorry." He replied so kindly, he started to cry.

"Now don't do that. And we made love, and got me pregnant with your child. That is a great honor, and one I am proud of. If that means going through this the rest of my life, so be it, I would gladly do it again I if I was given the choice. I love you, and nothing would make we regret that." He nodded his understanding, and leaned in to kiss me.

"You should really drink some water." he said with a chuckle.

"Yeah, probably." I said agreeing with him. I walked over to the water on the desk, chugged that, then followed up with the regeneration potion I was given. He helped me over to the bed we shared, and laid me down gently. He crawled over me to his side and I curled up right next to him and we both fell in to a peaceful sleep.