"suddenly, you're all over the world."
-
Lulu.
I don't understand why my foolish mind had made the decision of a regrettable action-and part of me did, but that's hard to admit. There were several pros to this situation and a fewer cons, though somehow, I managed to discover that in some scenarios, they cancelled each other out-leaving something, something that I couldn't explain without feeling that not enough was being told. Of course what I agreed to do was stupid however curiosity always plays a part in everything you do. A tingling, somehow nagging, vibe running through your veins, it being clearly heard in your ears, your mind pounding and pounding, all full of nonsense that's completely messing you up. Maybe I was experiencing an addiction to them or even to him, and I just didn't want to properly admit it or give into it. Everything changed and I mean everything. At times I became a person that I knew I wasn't and found myself being the almost definiton of rebellious. Things breaking and mending all at once, an abundance of emotions being way too in depth for you to handle or even understand. Acquaintances, and people I thought I could trust got the impression it was my prerogative-I could do whatever I wanted to do. I acted like it too. That I was old enough to make decisions, I was mature, when I got up to no good, I was always in the right-I guess the real truth hurts because I clearly wasn't. Being invited into all sorts of secrets, being shunned out of them, all played a part-either exciting me or leaving me shattered.
Associating with them was practically the life of the party but deep down, I secretly knew it was a complete mistake and it'd leave a definite scar with me for eternity.
