Broken Innocence

Ch. VII

“What do you mean? She can’t be dead.” I say all while trying to keep my voice from cracking. “Last time I saw her she was healthy-”

“She killed herself.” Miss. Pierce said with a heavy sigh. 

I didn’t want to believe any of it, but I knew deep down that she has no reason to lie to me. I had absolutely no idea why Rachel would kill herself because she actually seemed pleasant with her life. I saw no signs of her wanting to actually kill herself in the short period of time I have known her. 

“H-How?” I found myself questioning.

“She suffocated herself...for the last few days she has been saying that the voice in her head kept telling her to kill herself. She kept saying she had to obey the voice. We had her under our watch but it seemed as if she managed to use her shirt...”

Then the rage kicked in.

“What??” I nearly shouted, moving to stand. “You told me she was fine! You told me there was nothing to worry about and you are just now telling me that she has been locked up this whole time because she was having a mental breakdown??” I couldn’t believe she would actually lie to me.

Miss. Pierce stood, her hands on top of her desk. “I didn’t want to worry you, Ari. She has fought with this mental illness since she has gotten here. We were able to convince her that the voices were not real, but somehow she went back to believing the voices in her head was real and that she had no other choice but to listen to it.”

“How can I learn to trust you ever again?” I snap. 

I know I didn’t know Rachel that long. I know we hardly had time to actually get to know one another, but from what I have seen she was just a girl that truly needed help. Help to overcome the voices and to just live life like a normal girl. 

“I know I lied to you...and I’m sorry. I honestly am.”

“Yeah. Right.” I rubbed my forehead, feeling all of my emotions just going crazy inside of me. Rachel’s death just seemed as if it could have all been prevented if they had paid attention to what she needed. 

Maybe Michael was right. Maybe the security here was bad. 

“Can I go now?” I needed to get away from this woman. But I didn’t even wait for her to give me permission to leave. I stormed out, slamming the door behind me.

I walked in the empty white hallway, sniffing lightly. I could hear patients screaming on top of their lungs from various places, but saw no one else wondering by. I wrapped my arms around myself, my hair falling over my eyes; in this awful place, I felt so alone. Rachel was the first person I actually met while in this place and I actually started to like her. But now that she was gone, and with Devin wanting my head on a stick, I had no idea what to do. Not a single staff member here acted like they actually cared what the patients did-possibly hoping that maybe we would all kill each other and ourselves off so they wouldn’t have to mess with any of us. 

Maybe that’s why they put all those like Michael in the same area. In hopes that maybe by a lucky chance that he or someone else would kill everyone off. 

Maybe Michael was right.

It’s a kill or be killed situation. 

And now that I know I can’t trust Miss. Pierce, I’m going to have to figure out whom I can trust.

I completely skipped dinner and head straight outside. I didn’t even look around to see who was out there-instead I made my way to the fence, seeing Michael sitting at his spot and I ran my hand along the fence to catch his attention as I made my way to the back of the courtyard. He looked up, looking straight at me for a moment before pushing himself up and slowly made his way over. I looked back to make sure no one was actually paying attention to us, and of course, no one was. Guards were too focused on smoking and talking.