Dance with Devils x Reader

mage || 4

charlotte ☻

oh boy i got too lazy to post but i'm finally getting to it now that it's summer break, thank god. and i'm listening to the leaked twenty one pilots song and spent the past two days skyping my bf so that's cool.

hope you're all having / going to have a nice summer

~

   blood covered his rough knuckles as he slammed his fist into the wall another time. how many times had he done this in the past ten minutes? he had lost track. 

   just like he had lost track of all the mistakes he had made.

   god, he missed you. there was no way to explain the feeling he got in his chest whenever he thought of you, whenever he saw something that reminded him of you. it felt like he was being strangled, to the point where it was getting difficult to breathe at times.

   another fist flew into the wall. another one and he'd probably put a hole through it like he did to the table in the third library yesterday. everyone was on edge because of his behavior recently. but it wasn't like he had any other way to express what he had been feeling for the past week.

   your scent still lingered on his clothes, in his bed. what he'd do just to have you in his arms again. he would do anything to apologize. he didn't care how many time he'd have to do so. anything to have you back where you belonged.

   he counted the first ten digits over and over in attempt to keep his temper at bay before he broke something. it was getting difficult to stay standing, his vision becoming blurry. he put his hand against the wall and slowly guided himself to the bathroom.

   he put his hands on the edge of the sink for a moment before turning on the faucet. cold water met his face. he peered into the mirror, only to be met by someone he could barely recognize anymore. was that really.. him?

   disheveled hair, red eyes, accompanied by large bags underneath. was he always this pale? 

   he looked back down and stared at the drain. he just wanted to be happy. why couldn't have just one thing to himself, just for once? he put his hands on his forehead. a pressure pulled at his chest, jagged breathing approached soon after. maybe he just didn't deserve happiness.

   something was prickling out of the corners of his eyes and began to fall into the sink. him, crying? he'd never acted like this before. when was the last time he had cried? he gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut before yelling out and slamming his fist into the mirror, shattering it into pieces.

   you were his oxygen, and he had run out of it.

~

bAHAHAHA I WAS PLANNING ON WRITING FLUFF BUT YOU KNOW WHAT IT QUICKLY CHANGED INTO SOMETHING ELSE. SORRY NOT SORRY. 

i don't know if i'll make a part two to this, eh.

maybe i won't give mage a happy ending ;^)