When I Eat, I Hate Myself A Little More

Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20

I hesitantly got out of the bathroom and shut the door behind me to reveal somebody standing in front of my face. Eyes narrowed, a look of disappointment, anger, sadness. I don't know. My tear stained eyes met them and I instantly choked a little.

"Lance?"

He didn't bother to say anything, so he instantly went past me into my bathroom. 

"Lance what the hell are you doing, get out of there!" , I shouted as he rushed back out holding a very familiar box in his hand. My eyes instantly grew big. 

"Explain to me what the hell this is.", he said, expressionless.

"It's nothing." , I hissed and crossed my arms. What right does he have to just barge in like this and act like he owns the entire place especially at a time like this? I just can't handle anyone's attitude at the moment right now. Speaking of which where are my parents anyway, they wouldn't allow a guy to get in my room.

His expression stayed there and he placed his hands to his sides. He gave a sigh and ran his hands through his hair, clearly exasperated. He looked into my eyes and said, "You and I perfectly know what this is right?"

I just stood there looking at him.

"I clearly told you to go to the treatment centre however I received a call this evening saying that 'Lindsey Clarke hasn't entered or registered at all'. What did you want to do?" His voice sounded really angry. He continued saying, "and now you are here just going back to your usual ways."

Ouch.

That kind of hurt.

"Me?!", I hissed. "The problem isn't me right now, the problem lies with you. What right do you think you have to barge in and treat me so unfairly right now?! You can't just fucking force me to do everything your way and out of everyone I thought you'd be the one who understands me." 

I realized more tears were struggling to get out. I reached out and snatched the box back. I struggled to get the words out but I managed to say in a low whisper, "Get the fuck out of my house." I stared at him directly and harshly continued, "Now."

He seemed taken aback. 

Lance suddenly looked apologetic, but says nothing. He nodded and slowly went to the side of my bedside window and jumped out. I didn't even realize it was open the whole time.

It took me approximately five minutes to realize what actually happened. What was up with him? That's all I could ask myself. I just knew it, I thought at least he would understand but I guess not.

I brought my phone out and checked the time, 8:30 p.m. I couldn't even cry anymore to be honest. I just give up. I didn't do anything wrong right? I just can't comprehend what I did to deserve all this, making me believe that everything will be fine when in the end it isn't at all. 

I just wanted to forget everything now. Going through my music stash I brought out Memphis May Fire and put it on. I turned on my laptop and started going to the blog once again. To what you ask? Rant of course. It pisses me off the more that I think about it so I'd rather let it out than keep it now. I would explode into a gazillion pieces and good luck cleaning it up.

I have no idea what I am doing, I screw up everything don't I? I really don't want to bother about anything right now. It just sucks.

Before I could even continue, I briefly looked out of my room window and noticed something-- no someone walking towards the house. 

"No fucking way." It was Carlito.