song of the chapter: shiver - lucy rose
15 years old (one year ago)
Michael and I will have been friends for a few months now and everything seems to be flowing normally as far as friendships go, until one day Ashton starts acting weird and bringing up the subject that is Michael and I's relationship.
"Michael totally likes you," he says, breaking me from my peaceful morning thoughts on the bus. I pull an earbud out of the ear facing him and frown in a state of utter confusion.
"What do you mean? We're just friends and I'm, like, eighty-seven percent sure he's completely straight." I'm telling the truth, but something inside me is shoving doubt in my head and I'm not so sure about it anymore.
"I dunno, it just... seems like he does," Ashton says, an unreadable expression on his face. Ashton's like that: if he doesn't want you to know what's going on in his head, you won't.
"Did he tell you that he does?"
"No, but-"
"Well then you don't have any real proof, Ash. That's like me saying you seem like a serial killer, but like, where's the proof? There isn't any. So Michael doesn't like me." I affirm, trying to convince both of us.
"Well, hypothetically speaking, if Michael does like you, what would you do?" Ashton says, nudging me with his bony elbow. I'm not even sure I could like him. It almost doesn't feel right.
"Well does he like me or not?"
"Hypothetically."
"Right."
"So...do you like him back?"
"I dunno. Maybe," I say, feeling the warm tingle of a blush rise to my cheeks. What Ashton is saying almost feels like he's lying. My brain immediately jumps to the conclusion that clearly Ashton is just saying this to get me to say something stupid to Michael and embarrass myself. But the problem with this whole 'Michael hypothetically maybe liking me' thing has got my entire brain in shambles. I mean, he's cool and all, but I'm not so sure if it's romantic intrest I have in him. The problem is I don't have any realization for feelings like this so it's hard to tell. So do I say nothing at all?
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crash - muke / cake
Fanfiction"The higher you climb, the further you have to fall." Luke's got a dangerous addiction to Xanax due to his anxiety from his PTSD that he keeps from his family and friends, including his best friend Michael, who is getting concerned about him. Luke k...
