Seafoam //Completed//

Chapter 32

It had been three days since she'd moved in with Zac. School was confusing and scary. She saw Matty too many times and it always hurt as much as the last time. Ava was usually there to hold her steady but when she wasn't it was almost unbearable. She missed him. She missed talking to him. Sometimes, scrolling through her phone, she'd screenshot pictures or save them to send them to him, just to remember she couldn't anymore. He'd probably deleted her number from his phone or blocked her, anyway. He wanted nothing to do with her. He wouldn't even look at her. So she worked as far away from him as possible, letting him have his space. He sat with the kids from Drama and she sat with Ava and her friends, who'd embraced Lulu as one of their own even if they thought she was a little weird. Or pathetic.

But despite this looming cloud hanging above her, there was still a silver lining. Every day, her father would call her to see how she was. It was awkward and sometimes there were long bouts of silence from both ends of the phone but he was making an effort. Something she'd never even dreamed of happening. He'd told her he would be released from the hospital soon and admitted into a rehab center in the next town, about an hour's drive from here. The insurance was paying for the repairs on her dad's car and he would leave it for her since his license was suspended. She had hers even if she'd never gotten much opportunity to use it, but the thought of not having to depend on somebody for even her transportation was elating. "I'll visit whenever I can," she'd promised him the last time he'd called and he'd sounded so happy. Things really were turning around.

With Zac, things were still tentative. He'd gone back to the doctor early the morning after her first night and she hadn't seen him until she got out of school. The bandages were off but he kept his sunglasses on the whole day. Doctor's orders. Apparently his eyes were still not adjusting to the new cornea, according to Liam, so he still couldn't see. With her, he seemed a little serious, only addressing her to ask if she needed anything or when he had a question about the homework. He was hardly home however and Lulu had the growing suspicion that he was with Selene again.

Sleep came a like a heavy blanket at night sometimes, but there was comfort in the suffocation and the dark where her mind couldn't rattle into despair. She would dream quietly of things she had never seen and a lot of the time she wasn't even in her own dreams. Instead, she would dream of Matty and Ava and Zac going about their day naturally without her and it would make her think that maybe this world didn't need her. That maybe the people she considered to be her world could still function and the earth would keep spinning and spinning and spinning. When she would awaken, she'd struggle to catch her breath, as if an anvil sat atop it, crushing her ribs into her lungs.

On the third night, Lulu awoke to a soft rustling coming from behind her, and when she turned around, she could see a blurry outline moving cautiously around the room. When she checked her phone—momentarily blinded by the brightness she had forgotten to dim—the clock read 3:30 a.m.

"Zac? Are you alright?"

She heard something rattle and crash to the floor, and a soft curse come from Zac.

"Yes. Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you," he whispered.

"Is everything okay?" she asked again, sitting up on the small mattress.

"Yeah. I— Liam forgot to get me my painkillers. I'm just looking for some Tylenol."

Lulu got up off the bed and walked towards him using the light from her cell to guide her.
"You should've woken me up. I'll help you look for them." Absentmindedly, she placed a hand on his arm causing him to jump slightly. "Sorry! I didn't mean to startle you—"

"No, you're fine," he laughed shakily, but she avoided getting too close to him as she helped him look. Finally, she found the bottle beneath his dresser, having fallen when he knocked it down looking for them, and handed it to him careful not to let her hand touch his.