Doctor Who: The Evangelion Error (Book One)

Deleted Scene: Tea from Another Universe

Inside the TARDIS. Late August 2015. (The previous week).

"There we are!" The Doctor pulled a small electric kettle out from underneath a loose floorboard. He danced around the large console at the center of the room. "Now, the real trick is figuring out where exactly to wire it in. Tried right beneath the time rotor once. Turned around, found the tea was already made! Brilliant, right? Self-pouring tea! -- Well, not exactly self-pouring. Had to remember to pour it after the kettle was done, so the water could travel back and complete the loop. Still, convenient and all. Pity about all the Cherenkov radiation. Had some vacuuming to do after that, let me tell you..."

He turned and finally seemed to notice Shinji standing by the door, jaw open, staring at him. At the rust-colored room, a hundred times larger than the box outside. At the strange curving pillars that stretched from floor to roof. At the glass column at the room's center, surrounded by controls and switches and blinking lights. At the staircase off to the side, that led even further down to... somewhere.

"Oh, right." The Doctor scratched the back of his head. "Questions, I expect? This is usually the point where questions come in."

Shinji swallowed. "How - how is this possible?" he asked, as evenly as he could manage.

"Ohhhh, nothing too complicated. It's just a bit of spacetime, segmented off from the rest and curled up into a ball." The Doctor darted back around the column, kettle in hand. "Okay, maybe a little bit complicated. She's called the TARDIS, by the way. I could explain how it works, but you'd probably need about four or five advanced degrees to keep up. Mostly from schools on other planets."

Shinji took what little he could understand from that. "You're from another planet?"

"Yep." The Doctor flipped a switch. "Well, not just another planet - from a whole 'nother universe, technically."

"Another... universe?"

"Right. Think parallel timelines, each with its own Earth and humanity and Shakespeare and Tokyo and sushi -- parallel sushi." The Doctor glanced at a screen that had been bolted on to the side of the column at a haphazard angle. "Put it another way - imagine an alternate world to your own. Most everything's the same, but there's just a bit that's different. Traffic lights are blue instead of green. Tony Blair wasn't Prime Minister. South won the American Civil War -- that one's more common than you'd think, actually."

"... the what?" Shinji asked weakly.

"Far as I can tell right now, main difference between your world and the Earth I know is that Second Impact thing. Didn't happen in my reality. Well, that and the invasion by giant aliens. Plenty by normal-sized and largish aliens, mind you, but no great big giant ones. Well, not too many, anyway... not to mention, there doesn't seem to be anyone like me around to put a stop to things."

The Doctor plugged the kettle into the back of the screen. A shower of sparks erupted from a small panel by his elbow. He grimaced and pulled the cord out. He glanced back up towards Shinji. "Anyway. Where was I again?"

Shinji opened his mouth, then closed it.

The Doctor snapped his fingers. "Parallel sushi. Right." He went to the console's side and started to pull out cables. "Now, seperate universes aren't supposed to interact with each other at all - not anymore, anyway. But there was a bit of a mixup on my side of things -- bit of a, well, paradox. Blew a hole straight through my reality and into yours. Didn't actually know you could do that up until now. Probably for the best, that. Anyway, I went in to try to fix things. Wound up getting sucked down the rabbit hole, and here I am."

"... oh."

"Which leaves me in a great big ol' pickle, really." The Doctor pushed the kettle's plug into a clear tube that ran from behind one of the control panels. "Bit of a personal energy crisis. The TARDIS draws its power from the universe - my universe, specifically. No other realities need apply. So I'm cut off." The kettle started to glow with a strange green light and float up off the console. The Doctor shook his head and broke the connection. "Good news is, that rift up above the city is leaking quite a bit of energy from back home. Well, good news for me, not so good for the universe - either of them. So if I can just gather up and filter enough of it out -- You all right over there? You've been fairly quiet and all."

"Huh?" Shinji averted the Doctor's eyes. "S-sorry."

"Right." The Doctor sighed. "Sorry. Lot to take in, I know. I'm a bit rusty on the whole introductions thing. Been traveling on my own for a while now. Wasn't always like that. Used to knock about with some friends. But - well..."

"... travel..." Shinji stared out at the room. "This place moves?"

"Hohyes." The Doctor absentmindedly pulled a cable from out of the console. A handful of oxygen masks sprang out from the ceiling, where they hung limply from silver cords. He gave them an exasperated glance. "All of time and space in the blink of an eye. I'd take you for a spin, but like I was saying, we're a bit out of commission at the moment. See, the TARDIS pulled in some Void energy while we were crossing between worlds. Clogged up the power relays. It's a bit like food poisoning. I can clear them out if I can build up a big enough charge, but until then, she's rejecting anything I try to pull in..."

"Y-you." Shinji gulped. "Y-you talk about it like it's alive."

"That's because she is." The Doctor linked up the cable to the kettle's power cord. "Living timeship. Last of her kind in the whole wide universe. Well, last in my universe. Here, I suppose, she'd be the first and the last." He put his hand against the glass column. "Poor old girl. I put you through so much..."

Somehow - for some reason - that was it. Shinji felt something in the back of his mind buckle and fracture in two. He couldn't take anymore. He had to -- he had to...

He bowed stiffly. The Doctor looked up at him in surprise.

"Please forgive me," Shinji said, as formally as he could manage. "I have - I need to go."

He then bolted through the doors and back into the world he knew, as fast as his feet could take him.

***

The Doctor eyed the doors. He scratched the back of his head.

Then the Fifth was standing beside him, arms crossed, a concerned expression on his face. "He's... not quite our usual sort of recruit, is he?"

From outside, there was the loud and unmistakable sound of a fourteen-year-old being violently sick into a gutter.

The Doctor ran a hand through his hair. "Yeahhhhh...."