Treat You Better

32.

"Shouldn't you be at school right now?" Holden asked me. I'd gotten into quite the habit of sitting on his sofa and getting high over the past couple of days. 

"Yup." I slurred. He sighed and put his arm around me, letting me curl up into him. 

"When was the last time you slept?" He questioned me again. 

"What is this, an interrogation?" I countered. Looking back up at him, he gave me a stern glare which told me to answer the fucking question. I sighed in response. "I don't know, I can't sleep." 

"Try and get some sleep now." He ordered, moving to let me lie down. He placed a pillow under my head and covered me with a blanket. I closed my eyes and waited for sleep to take over. It took a while, I'm not sure how long because I didn't want to open my eyes; they were too heavy. 

I woke up a few hours later, to Holden softly shaking me out of my slumber. I hazily sat up and wrapped the blanket around me for comfort. 

"What time is it?" I asked. 

"About 7 at night." He said. I nearly jumped out of my skin, I have been asleep for hours. I'm not sure whether I felt better though. Holden handed me a glass of water, I drank it quickly but instead of hydrating me it just made me realise I was sobering up. 

"I should get going. I think I need something stronger." I mumbled, I also noticed that he had some friends over. Holden nodded and helped me up and gather my stuff. I left the apartment and started lazily walking down the hallway, but a guy shouting at me stopped me in my tracks.

He emerged from Holden's apartment and jogged towards me to catch me up. 

"I heard you." He whispered. I looked at him confused. "You need something stronger?" 

I nodded in response and he handed me a little plastic bag with two pills in it. I saw they had fairies on them and I knew exactly what they were. 

"What's the charge?" I asked, knowing I had very little money to my name at present. 

"No charge." He muttered. "I heard what happened, the first couple are always free." And with that he was gone. I took the little plastic bag and put it in my pocket. In New Orleans, night life had only begun so I got a bus to one of the clubs where Holden and Lucas took me and got in with my fake ID.

I was feeling pretty buzzed when I stumbled into the bathroom, I stood in the cubicle and stared at the little white pills. Wondering whether I should flush them or not. 

After pondering for a few minutes, I opened the bag and popped one in my mouth, letting the chemicals take me away for the rest of the night. 

I partied all night, danced all my troubles away and drank myself numb. I decided to walk home when the club shut. I tried not to stumble too much; I don't want to attract any attention to myself. Besides over the past couple of weeks I have gotten extremely good and pretending to be sober, the pill made this just more of a challenge. 

When I made the decision to walk, I hadn't realised just how long the walk was. But I got to watch the sun come up which was nice. The colours all swirled together, like one of those pain pours I had seen on Instagram. I wasn't sure if the colours were actually like that or if it was the drugs but I didn't care. They seemed to be wearing off now. After a few hours I finally arrived home. 

I unlocked the door and tried to get in as quietly as possible and I would have succeeded, if my family weren't all waiting for me. They looked scared out of their minds, I was struck by guilt at the look on their faces, I would have texted them but my phone died, hours ago and I knew they would be asleep by the time I found a pay phone. 

"Sorry." I muttered, walking past them and into the kitchen for a glass of water. 

"Where the hell have you been?" They all seemed to ask at once, their voices resonating throughout my body. 

"I was out, sorry my phone died." I responded. 

"We get that you're going through something but we want you to be safe." I wanted to scream at them but honestly, I was too exhausted. Why aren't they yelling at me, cussing me out, punishing me for staying out late? 

"Are you going to punish me or what?" I asked, tiredly. 

"No." My dad said, all too calmly. 

"Why the fuck not?" I asked, Mike just stared at me the same way they did- looking at the broken shell of his little sister that stood before him. I shrugged it off and looked at my parents for a response. 

"I think you're punishing yourself already." My mom answered. I scoffed at their response and shifted in my place. They all looked at me with pity and empathy, like I was a puppy that had been left at their doorstep, abandoned. 

"I'm fine. You don't have to worry about me." I responded, going to walk away but my brother stopped me. 

"That's our job." He said, I didn't make eye contact with him, instead I just waited patiently for him to let me go. When he did I silently made my way up to my room and into my shower.

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A/N

Sorry it's so short.

Also, don't do drugs kids and if you're going to drink, make sure you do it responsibly and legally. 

Thanks.

~Jadey6688