TRUST

Chapter 4: Deceitful (Part 1)

I was lost.

My feet stayed firm on the ground. No desire to move, no effort to change. I was still in that dark alley alone, as I was in this task. Alone.

The word sounded so heartless, so sad. But, why should it be? What happened? I was once a certain man, knew what he wanted, understood his decisions, and always had precise emotions. What was I then? Why was the news difficult to absorb?

Choices, was it the reason?

It wasn't, because it was not a choice. Father did not give me a choice, it was a command, a test. One must do as commanded by his king. But my heart was giving me trouble. Death never troubled me, causing death did not bother me either. I have killed many before without a thought, but this was different. She was different.

The people that I killed reasons why they should die, legitimate reasons. Killing her was like killing an innocent child in a middle of war. The child did not cause the war but still he suffered because of it. Then that would be wrong, it would be a sin.

Don't even try to talk about sin, Alexious. You were a killer long before you returned to your father.

That kill was different, it was.... a clouded judgment at a difficult time. I was just sixteen years old, merely a child—a young man that could make mistakes and did made mistakes. That could not be used as judgment. It could not.

***

Many years ago

It was my tenth year in the Barracks, and the test was approaching. Every one of us was to be divided into several different groups and we must elect leaders.

"You should be our leader, Alexious. You have what it takes." I remembered Nikias saying, he was one of the boy that was in my group. We have been training side by side since the first day we met, although we couldn't really be friends, because you just never knew when and who you had to kill to survive.

"What? I shouldn't be, I—" I opposed, I was barely known. I mean, why should it be me? I never led anyone before, I always fought alone.

"All in favor of Alexious as our leader, raise your hands!" Nikias ignored me and announced his 'brilliant' idea. The shocking thing was however, almost every boy in my group raised their arms with hopeful stares. Nikias looked back at me with a 'see, I told you' look from his green eyes. I nodded in return, no choice, I thought.

That year's test was the most hardest of all. We were to travel deep into the woods, separated from other groups. We must stay there and survive for months, for food we needed to hunt, shelters were not an option, and we must sleep in the pouring rain or didn't bother resting at all. However, the Paidonome that tested us was not the one who usually trained us. He was an important person from the Army; he wanted to test us himself. He gave a twist to the already deadly test. Without the twist, the test usually killed half of the boys for sure, with the twist? Who knew?

"Each year you all are tested for your strength, your ability to survive. This year it will be a little different, I will test you of your ability to work as one, to survive not only in a familiar situation, to take care of yourselves, and your ability to evolve into a man not a savage" He announced, making sure that he made eye contact with every boy, making them believe that one day they could carry this honorable title to fight with him. We all wanted that so badly, every one of us were thought thearmy and the fighting was Sparta was the greatest honor of all. Nothing else in this life would ever mater. Then we all scattered into the woods.

The twist was that we needed to find a ruby pendant that he hid deep in the woods. It didn't matter who could find it first because we had to stay in the woods for months. If you didn't find it, all you needed to do was steal it from the other group. Stealing was allowed, encouraged even. If someone stole from your group, defending it was allowed, killing the thief was a must if you could beat him, that was. It was possible that he would kill you.