Way Down I'll Go

The Hungry Gnaw that Eats Me Night and Day

Jo spent the afternoon resting with Johnny in his arms. 

The child would not tolerate being set down or held by anyone else, and Jo didn't mind. Resting was such a foreign idea to him; he couldn't remember a time he had sat for so long, especially when there was work to do.

He had called his bosses and had been surprised to hear how worried they were. Then again, he'd only ever missed work twice in 5 years, both because of sick children, and he had called each time. They had been understanding and told him to call when he was ready to come back. He wasn't getting paid for the time off though, so he planned to go back the next day no matter how he felt. It was how he justified resting in the meantime.

To his amazement, Rachel stayed the rest of the afternoon, playing with the boys and even helping them with their homework. At one point, Mikey and Adam got in a fight about who got to sit next to her during a story, and Jo had to step in. Through it all Rachel remained kind and gracious.

Jo had the opportunity to observe her throughout the afternoon. She seemed to genuinely enjoy being around the boys, which was unusual for someone of her status. She wasn't afraid to get down on the floor or act silly, and she laughed often, which made her eyes light up and her face shine. He knew she couldn't have slept much and she was still wearing the same scrubs from yesterday, so he couldn't understand how she still looked so perfect.

At the moment, she was sitting on the floor, wisps of blonde hair falling around her face, as the boys who explained a game to her. Jo listened to Sam's excited descriptions.

"So, each person says one ingredient and then the first person who went has to make them all into a dinner. And then we all pretend to eat it!" 

"Jo's the best at this game! Sometimes he gets so full pretending to eat that he's not hungry for real dinner!"

Jo jumped in before Mikey could reveal anymore on that subject and suggested the boys set the table. He invited Rachel to stay for dinner, and was surprised when she agreed. The menu wasn't exactly exciting: leftover vegetable soup with a hint of chicken that he'd made three days ago and somehow stretched to last this long. They were used to such simple food, and his stomach certainly wasn't being picky as it growled at the mere smell of it, but he didn't suspect Rachel would enjoy the meal.

He asked her to hold Johnny while he dished up the soup, despite her protests that he shouldn't be moving around so much. He didn't want her to see how he slipped the remaining bits of chicken into everyone's bowl but his own. Really, he had no business eating tonight. There was hardly enough soup to go around, especially with an extra person. So he gave himself the smallest portion possible while still appearing to eat.

The boys took care of entertaining their guest. They chattered incessantly and even Drew chimed in several times. Jo had to remind them twice not to shout at the table and to take turns. Rachel listened patiently to each of them, asking questions and laughing at their stories. She didn't seem annoyed by them at all, which he appreciated. Most adults didn't give his brothers the time of day.

"Do you have a mommy and daddy?" 

It was Adam who'd asked the question.

"I do. But they live about 2 hours away from me now and I don't see them very often."

"Our dad's in prison."

"Mikey!" Drew hissed at him.

"What? It's true!"

Drew looked at Jo and Jo looked at Mikey. Leaning over to him, he spoke softly.

"Mikey, that's not something we bring up at the table with guests."