April 28, 2019
1:55pm
a wreath of white roses lays upon my hair / each for the soul I have eaten / and white for the lost purity of another life /
like briar rose in her castle surrounded by thorns / I live a life of tender isolation and delusion / impenetrable like the mist over the pearl moon /
around my neck, there lies an angel / for company in the hell of my own creation / for even in hell, loneliness weighs on me like a ball and chain / in this life and the next I have betrayed God but his deep silence burns my skin like holy water /
holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.. /
oh, but I am no pious soul! / yet I hunger for the warmth of holiness / lament for any blessing / for I believe to be chased by tragedy /
o, how I wish to be saved by the sacred! /
here comes the flood to suffocate me sweetly, ever so sweetly / the beast will awake soon and temptations will run high but damnation has a divine ring to it / rolls off the tongue so whimsically / I think I shall live in desecration / damn me to hell / clip off my ivory wings / I desire mad, mad, delicious pain /
my soul is black with desire / with all the lovers I have consumed /
I keep them inside me, immortalized / writhing in morbid euphoria, / true love lasts for evermore /
and with this, I rejoice / in hypnotic mortification / I spread the ashes of lovers deceased into the soil of my gardens / and from their ashes, roses will bloom / their thorns will cut me anew and my ichor shall be the catalyst to building my empire of disillusionment / dancing with the ghosts of lovers in my crown of thorns
