What I Never Told You

Chapter 1

  It's been a year since the accident. 
  It's been less than a minute since I hit send and Everly has already replied:

Pick you up in an hour

~~

   Everly's black Camaro pulled into my driveway around noon. I raced down the stairs and out the door. I jumped in and turned up the radio full blast. She threw a smile in my direction and threw the gear into reverse.
  "So, has anyone asked you to the winter formal?" I asked her.
  "Haha nope. What about you?"
  "Same."
  "How has nobody asked you? You're gorgeous and so sweet."
  "I could say the same for you."

  We headed straight to the back of Bloomingdale's, grabbing any amusing outfits and accessories that we spotted and made our way to the dressing room. It's a tradition that Everly and I have had since forever: we try on the worst/goofiest clothes that we can find. We compete to see whose outfit is more atrocious and of course, take dozens of pictures. I slipped on a furry ecru sweater with paint splatters, neon yellow and orange yarn knitted shorts, and a bearskin to top it off. I checked myself  in the mirror and laughed. I was so going to win. My phone buzzed in my purse, but I ignored it.

  Everly and I stepped out of our dressing rooms, looked at each other wide eyed, and started cracking up. I couldn't contain the tears that were in my eyes as I gazed at her black emu feather dress, suspendered rainbow pants, and punk rock wig. "You...win...haha", I managed to say in between breaths.

  I pulled out my phone to take mirror selfies, so we could have our mini photo shoot. We struck multiple poses, mostly goofy, and took some burst shots. When I pulled up my gallery to review the pictures, I noticed that a memory from a year ago had popped up. It was a video of me and him, on the night of the incident. I felt my eyes well up and a sharp twinge of guilt in my heart. I quickly dismissed the notification before Everly saw it.
  Suddenly I felt suffocated. The air seemed depleted, and the room began spinning. I had to get out of there. Get that night out of my mind and more importantly him.

  "Let's go to the food court, Ev", I suggested as I frantically tried to change. I tossed the garments onto the table outside, not bothering to hang them and took off towards the food court.

  Everly ran after me and asked, "What just happened"? I just shrugged it off and studied the different cuisines that Lanai mall had to offer. I ended up choosing the Mediterranean place and headed over to an empty table. Snap out of it I commanded myself. She'll know that something's wrong. Minutes later, Everly slid in across from me with her greasy, gooey pizza.
  "Really, B? You got a salad? Health freak much? Sometimes, I question how we're best friends" she teased before taking a bite.
  "Shut up. Twenty years from now, you'll regret not being more healthy" I responded.
  "Regret having pizza? Never!"
  We spent the next hour talking about the gossip we heard around school starting from the scary new guy who got kicked out of his last school because of a fist fight all the way to the breakup fiasco that took place during lunch last week. Everly also told me about Ryder who had been getting on her nerves at school lately, "He's so annoying. He's always does things to embarrass me and throws crumpled pieces of paper at me during class just to exasperate me. I swear I'm going to kill him."
  That last sentence made the grim memory re-emerge in my mind as a cold shiver ran down my spine. I thought about last October: the karaoke, the phone call, and the glass covered road. As if Everly could read my mind, she pulled me into a hug, but she definitely had no idea what was going on in my mind or what I was feeling. Neither the guilt nor the sorrow.