Forbidden Kisses ✔ (Not Yet COMPLETE)

Awkward Moments

When I came home from the police station I felt beaten but proud. They took my statement, referred me to a doctor and after a thousand questions, photos and what felt at times like violations of privacy, they believed me.

At least I think they do. But they promised me that they opened up a case and will talk to my mom and other witnesses before drawing up charges against them both.

For a moment I wondered how honest my mom would be, but I keep remembering the way she thanked me when I took Jess. The way she surrendered to the police. I crossed my fingers and walked into the house confidently.

"Sarah? I did it!" I called. The house seemed to echo in response. I panicked, even more, when I looked at my phone and saw 34 missed calls. All from Sarah. I dialed her number with shaking fingers and waited impatiently for her to answer.

"Nats! You moron!" was Sarah's greeting, "I tried phoning you to tell you that my dad had an emergency and I had to bring Jess here."

I let go of the breath I wasn't aware that I was holding in and unclenched my hands.

"Stop playing Twinkle Stars with your fingers and come on over, " she laughed in response, hanging up before I could argue.

Is she serious? Can I really face him right now? The last time I saw him he practically chased me away. It was only a couple of weeks ago, but it wasn't very hard to remember. Embarrassed pink crawled up my cheeks as I thought of those last moments. The way I threw myself at him like a cheap... No, don't finish that sentence. I sighed deeply, looked down at my simple shirt and jeans and shrugged. He's seen me in worse.

"You're just going to fetch Jess, " I told myself out loud.  I let out a brief laugh before continuing, "You're not kidding anyone!"

The walk went quickly as I focused on the way the clouds seemed to fill up the blue sky in strange shades of pink and orange. It might rain, it might not. I kept thinking about it, like a distraction mechanism.

"Natasha."

I could not believe he answered the door. He stood there in every inch of perfection, and all I could do was swallow.

"Jess is in the kitchen, Sarah is feeding her chocolate cereal, " he murmured as he moved out of the doorway and gave me space to pass. I passed slowly, hoping that he would stop me, grab my arm, something. He didn't. I fought the disappointment burning in my heart and walked to the kitchen.

"I wanted to make pancakes for supper tonight, " I told Sarah as she fed her the last bite. Sarah looked at me guiltily and I sighed. It was supposed to be conversational, not accusatory.

"You know how to make pancakes?" Nathan asked from behind me, I nearly jumped out of my skin. I thought he would just go watch tv or something.

"What? No Criminal Minds tonight?" I asked in defense, not taking my eyes off Sarah's face, which was a confusion of emotions: shock, humor, guilt.

"I canceled my subscription, " he said softly, almost gently. It occurred to me then that I stepped right into it. So I did the only thing I could think of.

"But, I wanted to drown out my real-life problems with fake cases, " I patted myself on the back, it was the perfect nonchalant response, but inside the nausea of earlier that day built up quietly.

"Don't be ridiculous, " Sarah intervened, "Why don't you make pancakes for us instead?"

I could have kissed her right then. The tension left my body as I whipped out my phone and searched "Easy Pancakes Recipes".

"Well, that answers that question, " Nathan laughed and rummaged around in the fridge. He grabbed some eggs and milk and put it on the counter. Those were followed by oil, flour and measuring cups. He sat down next to Sarah and leaned against the back counter with a cocky smile that only he could pull off and said, "Go ahead, entertain us."

I considered for a moment how normal everything felt before I turned around and started to prepare the batter. I could hear them whispering and taking bets on the outcome of my adventure. Nathan has 100 bucks on me setting the fire alarm off. Very reassuring. I whisked the eggs and followed the instructions step by step.

It was all going so good until the mixture became lumpy. I panicked and started to stir it faster, it's not working. I heard a giggle from the peanut gallery, so I glared at them.

"What?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"Just scroll down a little bit, " Nathan chuckled, nodding at my phone, so I did. My cheeks glowed as I reread the line.

"The mixture should be lumpy, " I muttered, as I switched on the stove plate.

"The mixture should be lumpy, " I muttered, as I waited for the pan to heat up.

"The mixture should be lumpy!" The chorus behind me chimed in as a poured in the first scoop of batter into the pan. I managed to stay focused and ignored them but vowed to sprinkle salt over their pancakes.

"You can do this, " I whispered as I thrust the pan up in order to flip the pancake. It flipped.

"Well done, " Sarah said laughing, Jess squealed in delight, I could feel Nathan's eyes burning into my back, so I turned around and curtsied for the crowd. Which was a terrible mistake.

Long story short, Nathan had to finish making the pancakes. Sarah had to pay Nathan his 100 bucks and I had to wash the stove where the burnt pancake stuck to the plate.

"Hmm, " I murmured as I licked my fingers after eating my last pancake, sometime later.

"I'll take that, " Sarah laughed as she took my plate and placed it in the dishwasher. Jess was fast asleep on my lap and I stroked her face with the back of my hand.

"Here, " Nathan said holding out a wet cloth, his voice thick with an unrecognizable emotion.

"Thank you, " I whispered and took the cloth. I struggled to use it with my other hand holding Jess. I was just about to move her to make it easier when Nathan took the cloth and slowly wiped my hand. I looked up and our eyes met. It is strange how intimate such a simple gesture could be, as it felt like we were having the longest conversation.

"Let me take her, " Sarah said quietly and took Jess's sleeping form out of the kitchen. Nathan and I didn't blink.

"Natasha, " he whispered a second after we both heard a door close upstairs. The cloth was abandoned and he held my hand in his.

"Nathan, not now, " I sighed, and attempted to pry my hand out of his grip, he would not budge.

"I'm really sorry about what I said the other day," he said, tracing fire onto my fingers with his.

"Why are you apologizing?" I closed my eyes, preparing myself to drive in the knife and kill this thing before it starts.

"Don't say what you are about to say, " Sarah said coming into the kitchen. Nathan let go of my hand and we both stared at her in shock.