Doctor Who One-shots

Goodbye (12th Doctor)

“I COULD’VE GET YOU KILLED HERE!”

The Doctor opened angrily the TARDIS’ doors. He was storming in. I tried to follow him as fast as I could, but he was taking huge steps with his long legs – and his angriness mostly.

“But – I’m here! I’m fine!” I said, trying to defend myself.

“No, Y/N, you don’t understand.” The Doctor walked back in front of me and was staring right through my eyes. “I could’ve get you killed here.”

He said these words with such coldness, I was stuck in front of the console and couldn’t move. I was feeling so sad and so puzzled.

“But, Doctor, I don’t understand, I’m- at the end it went fine!”

“’Fine’?! You call this fine ?!” and he went back again at me, screaming and waving his arms. Never have I seen him like this. Maybe this time I screwed up.

“What if I wasn’t here to save you? Was if- if they didn’t think of keeping you as a bait and killed you right there?!”

“I know you saved me, and I know that you keep saving me! I know! You don’t have to remind me this all the time! What do you want to say? That I’m not strong enough to keep myself alive, or that I can’t do something without you watching my back?!” I couldn’t hold back and said everything I had on my heart.

The Doctor turned his back from me, leaning a little against the console. He took a deep breath.

“What I’m saying is, you don’t have to put yourself in danger every time we go somewhere.”

“W-What?”

I was now laughing. In nervousness and incomprehension.

“What should I’ve done then? Letting them insult me? Letting them looking at me as if I was some kind of prey? Just, let it go?!”

“Y/N, just, you don’t have to-“

“No, don’t tell me what to do anymore. I know I’m your companion and I’m always seen as well. But I’m my own person. I’m Y/N, not just the ‘Doctor’s companion’. You may be surprised but I have a consciousness, and I’m tired of hearing you and everyone telling me what I should do and what I shouldn’t. I’m not a kid or anything. I know what I’m doing, I think of my actions before doing them.” I took a pause, before finishing “and if there’s one thing you taught me, it’s to not let it go.”

The Doctor was now facing me. He was looking at me with concern while I was panting from my speech, which I nearly screamed because of how angry I am.

“Y/N, I- I’ve never said anything like this, I know you’re your own person!”

He was approaching me, with his arms a little outstretched, as if he wanted to comfort me.

“No, but I’m tired of feeling like this.”

Silence. The Doctor had put his hands on my shoulders, but I didn’t respond to his gesture. It was the best physical contact he could do. I was just standing there, sobbing from all these emotions.

“Take me back home, please.”

“What?”

“Take me back home, please.” I repeated.

I insisted calmly. I wanted to be alone, to be far from the Doctor for a while. I loved him, but sometimes he was… too much.

He slowly went away from me and instead he went to the console to enter some coordinates in silence. The TARDIS growled softly, as if she knew what happened.

“Will you… will you come back? Do you… still want to be with me?” asked the Doctor timidly, with his little voice, and I suppose his puppy eyes.

I was turning my back to him. I wouldn’t want him to see me like that, with tears on my eyes.

“Y-yeah, just… give me some time, okay?”

He didn’t respond. I knew he disapproved what I was doing, even if he yelled at me before.

“Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you. I was scared. I don’t want to lose you…”

And I didn’t respond too. I knew he lost precious ones, but I don’t know if he counts me as one.

“Please… Y/N, is this a farewell?” his voice cracked.

“No, it’s… it’s a ‘see you later’.”

I walked toward the TARDIS’ doors. The Doctor didn’t say a word. I was about to close the door but I saw the Doctor’s face, all wet because of his silent crying.

“Goodbye, Doctor. See you later.”

And I closed the doors.