WHEN WE WERE YOUNGER. banginho

°•10•°

Haha Hannah spilled her juice today
And it made a smiley face like stain
It was funny
Just thought you should know-
Seen 5:39am

Why are you up, idiot
It's like 6am for you
Sleep >:[
Seen 5:51am

Well if you're going to look at least respond-
Seen 5:53am

I'm gonna assume ur takin a shit or smth so I won't bug you anymore <3 poop in peace luv
Seen 6:00am

That's a long ass crap dang-
Seen 6:11am

...idk what's going on but when you're ready to tell me I'm here to listen <3
Seen 6:31am

Minho rolled over in bed, dull eyes transfixed on the scene outside his window. It wasn't anything special, just his backyard, but it was a lot better than focusing on what was currently going on in his head.

He was causing Chan suffering.

He was the one keeping Chan from being happy where he was at the moment.

He cost Chan his best friend.

With every new thought, Minho's breath sped up even more. He tried to make himself concentrate on the little bird on the fence outside but he just.. couldn't.

He couldn't help from thinking that what he and Chan were doing was too much for them. The abstract calls, the lack of sleep- if Chan had a bad sleep schedule before Minho came back into his life it was nothing compared to now- Chan thought Minho didn't notice, but how could he not? Long distance relationships were hard for responsible adults, let alone stressed out teenagers.

Minho wiped at his tears when he felt his phone begin to ring. He held it into the field of his blurry vision and felt his mood shift even lower. It was Chan. Yet again. On a school night.

Minho clicked "ignore call" and let his hand fall back to the bed beside him.

A moment later he received another text. 

I really wish I could hug it all better for you rn..
Seen 6:45am

The simple text broke something in Minho, and the long-restrained tears started to make their way down his face. He breathed raggedly against his rapidly dampening pillow, trying not to think about Chan or their situation.

It was a little difficult not to, however, and he let out an upset groan, sitting up just long enough to throw his phone across the room. Luckily, it landed face down on his beanbag, undamaged, but he wouldn't care about that until later.

He clutched a stuffed animal to himself tightly, unable to see which of his babies it was due to the overwhelming confusion brought about by a breakdown.

He barely even heard his bedroom door open over the sound of his own sharp inhales and shuddering cries.

Then a firm hand was tracing over his back, and gentle words being whispered in his ear. The hands, although relatively cold, were familiar and comforting as they wiped away his tears calmly. The accompanying voice told him to sit up and he did it without question.

"I'll be right back, okay. Keep holding Mr. Muffins, hmm?"

He did as he was told, and not a moment later, his mom reappeared with a full glass of cold water. "Drink, baby."

Not having to think about it twice, Minho let her guide his head to the cup and took a few sips. Soon the whole thing was downed, and he was left with only a few remaining snuffles.

His mom let him snuggle against her shoulder as she rubbed his back comfortingly. She didn't make him talk or anything, they just sat like that for countless minutes, no sounds apart from Minho's upset noises and his mother's quiet murmurs.

When he seemed to calm down enough to shrink away from her sheepishly, she knew it was okay to snort. "Minho if I was mad at you, do you think I would've just done that?"

"I mean if you were a good person yeah."

"Ouch," she said, slipping onto his bed beside him. She stared at his ceiling for a bit. "Hon if you want to tell me what's wrong I'm here."

Minho opened his mouth to snap something, but she beat him to it. 

"I know I haven't been, as of recently, but I am now. I'm sorry, baby. I'm your mom, and nothing should come between us like that, especially if it makes you like this."

Minho shook his head despairingly. "You aren't why I'm like this momma."

"Oh? Care to elaborate?"

"So, uh.. the friend you saw me with- and yes, just a friend- that was Jisung. After that I got in touch with Channie again and we.. sorta,, got together I guess?"

"He's in Australia, baby."

"You think I don't know that?"

"Okay, geez."

"We really really like each other, ma. Scary like. But," Minho's eyes trailed up to the ceiling, and his hand searched for his mom's arm to latch onto. "His best friend likes him too, and he's been shunning him because of me. And the time differences are just…"

"I thought I'd heard you on the phone late at night!! I knew it!"

"Not the point.." he sighed tiredly. "Long distance is really hard. I can't be there for him. I really can't. And we're so young.. he should be enjoying life, not worrying about someone miles upon miles away. That's not a way to live…"

His mother hummed and stood up, finding her son's hand and squeezing it comfortingly.

"You and Channie always were so close.. it's not surprising. It was bound to happen. There is no good way out of this, Minho. I wish I could say there is but there isn't. Whatever you do, just make sure it's the better poison. What's gonna be best for both you and him in the long run? As much as it hurts now… it'll heal. It always does. You're staying home today. I'll call the school." She squeezed his hand once more before leaving him alone to his thoughts. 

- - - - - - - -

This doesn't reflect my beliefs in any way <3 if you're happy and healthy in a long distance relationship, then go for it, but Minho and Chan aren't really healthy or happy at this point-