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The Dearly Disturbed
Author:RiverGardenGirl
Favorite Chapter: 9 It was so hard to choose but I think chapter nine pulled me in the most. Between the maze and that feeling that they were maybe working with their curses rather than fully against them I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. I am loving how the curses have been developing and growing and I can't wait to see how they help and hinder in bigger 'battles'.
Favorite Character: Malcolm, hands down. We all love a brave hero but personally I love to see someone ready to save their own head first. Plus there's that whole blocked memories bit that I'm extra excited to see rear its head.
Grammar & Spelling (Needs Work, Good, Excellent): Overall good. There were a few instances of falling into the wrong tense or doubling up on past tense verbs. I pointed a few out and they're all easy fixes. My suggestion, which someone gave me a while ago, is to read the chapters out loud.
1. Tried to defeat instead of defeated, cast instead of casted, just things like this where the word hasn't been properly put in past tense.
2. Elevated, tattered and insightful, just misspelled or wrong word choice, I noted them in their respective chapters.
3. There are a few areas where the wording gets a little stiff and a contraction would make a world of difference, a wouldn't for a would not and so on. I found the parts without any contractions at all took me out of the flow.
If I wasn't doing a review, I would have clicked the story just by looking at its cover: Yes I think so, it looks interesting and the title is clearly displayed.
After reading the summary, I wanted to read the story: Yes! I got such strong Wizard of Oz meets The Nightmare Before Christmas vibes and that first mini blurb before the main synopsis was adorably creepy.
The most likable character is: Vincent feels like the most likable guy here but I'm not sure how much of that is because of the cool head he keeps, pun intended, or because there's so much focus on him being the driving force of the adventure. I think as the story opens up further others may shift the focus and take center stage.
The most unlikeable character is: Obviously Ceridwen...but more seriously, Ceridwen. I hate her but I also love her existence. I'm curious to see why someone so all powerful feeling needs them under her control. Also I'm not the biggest Kierra fan, I think it has something to do with her always being shown by Vincent and it almost feels like she lets him carry her burdens as well as hers. There was that little change in the maze though so I haven't tossed her in with Ceri yet. Although a Creeper versus a witch....I'd watch that.
The story conveys something that I strongly believe in or care about: There is magic shooting out of every moment here and it draws you in so fully that it almost feels like a real place you could fall into. I love that it's not these cursed creatures trying to go about the mortal world, trying to be regular people. The Under Realm is terrifyingly fantastic.
