You Sunshine, You Temptress (l.s)

I Walk The Streets All Day

(Sorry for any mistakes, I had to re-edit the whole thing so I may have missed some stuff)

Tysm for 15k. We're nearly at 16k but we hit 15 since I've last updated and just ahhhh thank you thank you thank you 

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Harry

Bare white space covers every square inch of my head, everything spiraling, spinning and smashing with one another within the confines of my skull until there was a tormenting silence followed by a state of nullity.

Nothing.

The sole of my shoe slaps against the wet, raw pavement as I trudge my nearly lifeless body down the desolate street. Each time a car swerves to avoid colliding with my piece of shit body, I nearly scream. A small part of me wants to shout to the cars driving away, "Why the fuck didn't you hit me?! Make it easy for me!"

How long have I been walking? Painful numbing reached my feet a long time ago when the adhesive of the cheap duct tape loosened around my shoe and the freshly fallen snow snuck its way into the sole, wetting my sock and numbing my toes.

I walk and walk and walk, laughing to myself each time a worried mother pulls their kid to the other side of their body to avoid me. I may have been out in the bitter cold for what feels like eternity and so maybe I look a bit frightening, but if they knew how close I am to crumbling to the ground and weeping until my lungs caved in inside my chest, their reactions to my presence would change drastically.

Minutes turned to hours, hours turned to a lifetime, and my mind has been a complete fog ever since I stepped foot outside his house. Shop owners locking up, turning off the lights and closing down for the night. My feet carry me around every corner, the only sign that I'm still alive and this is my reality are the honking horns in the distance and the sharp stabbing pain in my heart each time I breathe and think back to the boy whose name I can't bear saying out loud ever again.

"Sir, are you feeling alright? You don't look too good," A distant and unfamiliar voice breaks me away from my trance. I tear my eyes from the ground and look up at a slender young woman with long black hair that falls in waves over her shoulders.

My lips fall open as I try to speak, but a low choked noise is the only audible sound that comes out, my throat feeling like I've swallowed sand, but I'm grateful. I never want to hear my voice again.

"Why don't you come inside for a while, hmm? You can get warmed up and I can call someone for you," The nameless woman doesn't wait for me to respond, she just places her long slender fingers in my numb and trembling hands and leads me through the double doors of what looks to be a restaurant.

I'm engulfed in warmth and the savory smell of garlic bread as soon as we step inside. Booths and tables are over the entire floor, everything a shade of dark red or brown. Pictures line the walls, some looking to be taken 100 years ago and others as if they were taken a few months back.

"Why don't you go sit in a booth, I'll get you a glass of water," I nod and step down a few carpeted stairs, wetting the burgundy carpet as I make my way over to the first booth I see.

I sink into the booth, my legs feeling like jelly the moment I sit down like they were begging for me to just rest for at least a moment. I sat a few minutes after I left his house on the wet curb of the street, but that was only to catch my breath and stop the violent cries slipping past my lips.

I look around at the dark toned, pristine dining room, studying the pictures and decor on the wall illuminated by the dim lighting of the restaurant.