Seoul University » bts & skz

8: Holy Mother Of Dhanno

(a/n: remember how I randomly put Wooyoung and San in the previous chapter? HAAN AB MAI ATINY BHI HU LOLOLOL WOOSAN FOREVER

Waise itna late update karne ka plan nahi tha but beh jaati hai zindagi hawaaon main *intellectual*)

Xiumin tirchhi aankhon see dekhta k Hyunjin aur Taehyung kuchh plan kar rahe the, aur Tae bolta, "Maine kaha tha k apna muh band rakhna! 

"Kab, bhai?" 

"...Maine nahi bola kya?" 

"Nopity nope." 

"Achha toh ab bol raha hu," Taehyung sighed, "Chup chaap khade rehke bas mundi hilana." 

"Okay, bro." 

Hyunjin aur Taehyung turned to look at Yeonjun and Beomgyu, who were glaring daggers at them. Bas dagger sahi main phekne ki hi der thi. 

"We're ready!" Hyunjin declared, and Yeonjun retorted, "Aaja maidan main, chhokre!" 

Hyunjin turned to Taehyung, "Yaar yeh chhokra bol raha hai mujhe." 

"Toh tu nahi hai kya?" Tae asked. 

"Hu, par jab aise bolega yeh toh achha nahi lagega na." 

"ISKI TOH PHAT GAYI," Beomgyu loudly laughed. 

Yeh baat Taehyung k dil par lagi aur uski ego ko constipation wala dard hua. He stepped up and spoke, "START KARO AB!" 

Baekhyun pareshaan hokar 'start' bolta, and before anyone could say anything, Taehyung started, "Hwang Hyunjin and I aren't a fit for this club since we don't have any strong viewpoints on anything." 

"That could be solved through some reading and gaining knowledge," Beomgyu stated. 

"But it also requires firm beliefs as well as a spectrum of perspectives," Tae shot back. 

"Oh bhaisaab, bade shabd bol raha hai yeh toh," Hyunjin fanboyed. 

"However, those beliefs don't always pertain to building a perspective at all times," Yeonjun spoke up. 

"But I, and Hwang Hyunjin, are rigid idiots, am I right?" Taehyung asked, and Hyunjin ne badi zor se mundi hilayi. 

Xiumin laughed, "Alright, you can stop now." 

"Maine toh abhi ek hi line boli thi bhaiya!!" Beomgyu argued, aur Yeonjun ne uske pet me apni koni maari use chup karane k liye. 

"That's okay. The results are," 'Zoom in' bhaisaab stated, "Hyunjin and Taehyung, very strong argument. We agree with your side of argument." 

"Thank you," Taehyung proudly spoke. 

"Which is exactly why we think you are rigid idiots. You two have been rejected, thanks for coming." 

"KE BHAI?" Hyunjin ki aankhein phat gayi, and he looked at Tae, jise zor ka jhatka dheere se laga, "...what the FUCK-" 

---

Felix looked at San as he backflipped and kicked on a piece of wood, breaking it into two halves. Jimin k paseene chhoot rahe the, aur woh bolta, "Hume yeh karna hai?" 

"Haan!" Wooyoung kehta, "Waise aaj sirf auditions hi hai, toh tumhe wooden piece todna nahi hai." 

Felix and Jimin sighed in relief before Wooyoung dropped a bomb, "Sirf wood pe dent maarna hai." 

"Dent? Mai? Mai dent maaru?" Jimin spoke as if it was the weirdest shit he'd ever heard. And it was. 

"Haan!" Wooyoung cheered, "Chalo, Felix mere puttar, maar k aao!" 

Felix darr-darr ke aage gaya aur wooden piece ko dekhta aur bolta, "Lakdi bhaiya, please ek dent khaa lo." 

"Kitna pyaara hai yeh," San cooed, and phir Wooyoung ki taraf dekhta, "Tu bhi itna pyaara ban jaya kar kabhi, lallu." 

"Haww-" 

Felix breathed in and out, and Jimin peeche se thumbs-up deta, and then Felix slammed his leg onto the wooden log... 

...And kuchh tootne ki awaz aayi. Woh lakdi nahi thi. 

"HOLY MOTHER OF DHANNO!" Felix cried, holding his foot and screaming. Everyone scrambled over to him, and Jimin asked, "BHAI TU THEEK HAI?" 

"THEEK LAG RAHA HU KYA?" 

"LIXIE MERE PUTTAR!" Wooyoung gasped loudly, "CHAL DOCTOR K PASS CHAL!" 

"CHAL HI TOH NAHI SAKTA MAI!" 

"Baat toh sahi hai," San nodded. 

"AB?" Jimin questioned. 

"MUMMAAAA!" Felix cried. 

--- 

Jisung was crying, "Kumar Jungkook, mujhe bhi Hanuman chalisa sikha do. Ab toh yahi zindagi reh gayi hai." 

Jungkook spitefully hasta, "Tumhare bas ki nahi hai." 

Currently, Taeyong, Jungkook, and Jisung were standing in front of a cow (jiska naam Munni tha), and Taeyoung kehta, "Jisung, aage jaakar Munni ko phuslao." 

"...Munni meri girlfriend nahi hai bhai," Jisung kehta, "Kya bolu ise?" 

"Try toh karo!" 

Jisung aage badhkar Munni ko timidly bolta, "Munni... meri pyaari Munni... Valentine's day par chocolate gift karunga-" 

"RAM RAM RAM RAM!" Jungkook apne kaan bandh karta apne haathon se, "BLASPHEMY!" 

"Jisung, bhai... aise nahi karte," Taeyong nervously laughed. 

"Okay," Jisung spoke, and turned to the cow, "Munni... talk dirty to m-" 

"MERI MUNNI KE KAAN!" Taeyong came running to Jisung and Munni, "BACHHI HAI WOH!" 

"MUJHE KYA PATA?!" Jisung cried. 

"NIKLO YAHA SE TUM DONO! MERI MUNNI BECHARI!" 

And, just like that, none of the six could find an actual good society to be a part of. 

(a/n: Wooyoung gives Punjabi vibes, like I know k agar woh Indian hota toh 'assi tussi lassi pissi' karta ghumta 

LAST UPDATE WAS IN JULY, WE'RE IN NOVEMBER NOW!! EFFICIENCY DEKHI MERI? 

Jai coffee ki! 

anyways, did you like thisss? 

thanks for reading! i love you!)