How To: Not Completely Ruin Your Life (#Wattys2015)

Expectations

Little known fact, my brain hates me, it tells me I can do all these really impressive things but when put into practice always go horribly wrong. Two strong examples of this are drawing and accents. When I was in art class we used to be asked to draw certain objects infront of us, this could be anything from an apple to a fellow classmate. My brain would look at whatever I was drawing and say "you've got this, just draw it." It would show me a picture in my head of my amazing end result and I'd start drawing. Its only until I stop where I realise I've made one of my friends look like she only has 3 strands of hair and a melting face, trust me not a good look.

At Disney World Florida they used to (it closed in July) do these drawing classes whereby a Disney artist would show you how to draw a whole host of Disney characters ranging from Mickey Mouse and Pluto to Carl from Up and Joy from Inside Out. (Note to self: just because you're older than the last time you came doesn't mean you're any better, light pencil action, LIGHT!) (Secondary note to self: just when your confidence grows they'll ask you to draw a character who was originally created via computer and expect great things,it's at this point their expectations need to be lowered.) "Yeah but I was doing it Picasso style...." no one saw my greatness. This reflected in my grades so I dropped art class like it was not only hot but was about to spit the kinda fire only found in a mixtape from an underground artist with a name like Lil Cookie or Big Cheesecake.

Accents are a similar story, they sound perfect in my head but when put to practise I sound like if Siri was learning to speak Chinese with a sock in her mouth. Elegant. When asked what accent I shamelessly tried to achieve there is only one answer, cultured. This motherfucker has been places guys!

Something I've never really understood but we all do it when attempting accents is say the name of the place or person we are imitating. For example Hey y'all, I'm from Texas. Yeehaww. Or Apples and pears m'lady, blimey it's a chilly day in London. I'm also going to assume that you read those phrases in the intended accents too, don't you dare lie to me!

So expectations, make them realistic. Sure, have extravagant goals and dreams but just make sure your expectations of them aren't too out there, you may get disappointed. If anything lower your expectations a little, that way every mediocre this is gonna feel like winning The Super Bowl!