hatred | miniminter

16

my head feels heavy as i groggily open my eyes, the sound of simon's heart beat drumming through my ears whilst i lay comfortably on his chest. i bring a hand to my head as a headache develops and a pit forms in my stomach as a result of the many tequila shots. i look up slightly, noticing simon still sleeping, his breathing heavy, but his arms remain holding me close.

it takes me a moment to take in the unfamiliar surroundings, being laid in bed in a room i have not really been in before. but i find myself glancing around simon's room, taking everything in as a means of trying to understand him more because he is the only person i barely know anything about because he does not let me.

he stirs beneath me, his breathing now lighter as he brings a hand to stroke through my knotted hair. "your hairs a mess." he groans, his voice raspy as he brings a hand to wipe his eyes, pulling his head up to look at me.

"i wonder why." i look up at him, rolling my eyes, still resting against his body.

"i feel awful." he sighs, plummeting his head back into the pillow.

"you didn't seem very drunk." i hum, turning away to rest against him.

"well, situations like jj sober me up a bit more, but i was still pretty fucked."

"oh right." i nod against him, slowly lifting my head up from his body to get my phone. falling into the pillows beside me, i glance at my notifications and scroll through my socials. both of us now laid in silence, one of the things i hate about simon and i sleeping together - the morning after.

we hear a knock at the door and a very rough jj strolling in. "can someone tell me what the fuck is going on?" he huffs, sitting on the edge of the bed. i hold the duvet tight against my naked body, furrowing my eyebrows at him. "oh, sorry eden." he stands up, visibly fragile.

"wait in the kitchen," simon sighs and then looks back at me, "we'll come in a minute." i nod in agreement as jj holds a hand against his head, leaving the room. i breathe in deeply, not knowing how i will explain this to jj when i cannot even explain it to myself. simon slides his feet out of the bed, throwing his head into his hands as he leans over. my eyes follow up and down his spine.

"what's up?" i question.

"just hungover and he doesn't make it much better." he shakes his head, but i can tell that something else is bothering him. lifting his head from his hands and walks towards his wardrobe. "here." he mutters, throwing me a t-shirt and a pair of joggers.

"thanks." i murmur, throwing the t-shirt over my head and pull the joggers up my legs, which clearly drown me. i attempt to pull them up my legs as much as possible to avoid tripping over them.

"cute." he chuckles, his eyes flickering up and down my body. i walk towards a mirror, glancing at myself.

"fucking hell." i pull myself a disgusted look in the mirror, raking my fingers through my hair as i lean in to look at the half disappeared makeup.

"come on." he sighs, ushering me towards the door. we are met with a hungover jj, sprawled out across the sofa with a large bottle of water in hand.

"so, can you please tell me what the fuck is going on?" he turns his head to face us both, my arms crossed over my chest as i glance up at simon to say something first.

"don't really know what to say." simon shrugs his shoulders, going to sit on the sofa so i decide to sit opposite.

"what do you mean?" jj raises his voice, now sitting up. "okay, okay. how did this start?"

"erm," i play with the ends of my hair, "don't really know."

"just happened on holiday." simon shrugs his shoulders, "guess it's just been carrying on." he turns to look at me and i nod in agreement.

"when on holiday?" he questions.

"when," simon grins, "when you couldn't find me and i managed to convince you that you were too drunk and i was definitely in bed when i wasn't."

"oh shit, really?" he raises his eyebrows, looking at simon then looking at me, all 3 of us grinning.

"mhm." i nod.

"but - but eden," he furrows his eyebrows, "you could literally sleep with anyone like, everyone fancies you."

"shut up." i laugh, shaking my head.

"it's true!" he turns to simon, asking for agreement.

"yeah. it's true." simon mumbles, rolling his eyes as he falls back into the sofa with his arms folded over his chest. "it's very true." he raises his eyebrows.

"so, why simon?" jj questions.

"can't say i know the answer to that question." i sigh, picking at the skin on my bottom lip anxiously.

"you guys literally hate each other!" he brings both hands to his head, still confused, "i don't get it."

"just keep it between us." simon huffs, looking at jj.

"i will, i will. it's just weird." he mutters, narrowing his eyes at us both.

"no seriously jj, no one can know." i sigh.

"okay, okay." he throws his hands up in defence, "my lips are sealed. but do you guys not think you should actually just get along now?"

"why would we do that?" simon asks.

"well, you like each other."

"we don't like each other." simon and i say in unison, turning back to look at each other as a smirk forms on my lips. we're a lot more alike than i thought.

"whatever." jj mutters under his breath. "i knew something dodgy was going on when you kissed during truth or dare, i was wondering why you didn't kiss cal or anyone else."

"i was in two minds about it." i raise my eyebrows, "we might film a video together though." i shrug, looking back at simon.

"yeah, like an assumptions or something."

"the fans would love that." jj nods in agreement, "should do it soon."

"yeah." i sigh, looking back at simon, "we'll plan a day."

"well, you weirdos." jj lifts himself from the sofa, pulling a disappointed face at simon and i, "i'm off back to bed."

"alright." simon nods, watching jj leave the room.

"can you take me home?" i look at simon, listening to my rumbling stomach.

"hmm, okay." he murmurs, lifting himself from the sofa, "come on." i follow his lead, walking back into the bedroom to gather my things. "you can keep those on." he points to the clothes i'm wearing.

"okay, thanks." i lift my dress up from the floor, shoving the shoes over my feet but not tying them, sighing at the obvious walk of shame i am needing to do now. we walk to his car, stumbling over my own two feet every so often, instantly making me regret not putting my shoes on properly.

"you're such an idiot." he mumbles, opening up the car door.

"shut up." i hiss, getting into the car, throwing my head back into the passenger seat as the hangover instantly overwhelms me. we silently drive to my building, only the radio playing between us as i concentrate out of the window.

"i guess we'll pick a day to film then." he looks at me, the car now coming to a stop.

"i mean, if that's what you wanna do." i shrug my shoulders.

"don't really mind." he sighs, staring straight at me. "i'll erm," he scratches the back of his neck awkwardly, "i'll see you then."

"yeah. bye." i nod, softly smiling at him, not receiving one in return.