The Life Beyond You

Chapter 3

I don't know what I thought Knox would do. Kill me? At this point death feels like a warm welcoming. His hands are hurting my thighs, his arms are scarred in various places. His veins running up, and dissapearing under his shirt. He didn't make eye contact, he just trudged through what I think is a Dojo, and up the stairs. We entered a warm room, the smell of vanilla candles filled the air. A small roll out mattress was in one corner, and a desk in the other. A small record player sat on his dresser, almost begging to be played. He set me down on the mattress and walked into the bathroom. I was shaking, I didn't think I just fought someone, I was still trying to believe Esteria drugged me.

"Taking my sword was a jerk move. This wouldn't of happened." I say, pulling my skirt down to cover what tiny bit of leg it could. No thanks to Esteria.

"Lift your leg up." Knox kneeled on one knee and raised the other for me to rest my leg on. I winced as I moved it, trying to shove the pain down. He studied the wound, and cleared off the dry blood with a warm rag.

"It's not that deep." His eyes were a watery gold, they look worn out and tired.

"Sorry I yel-"

"Stop."

"I just wanted to apologize-"

"THAT'S THE ISSUE." He was squeezing my leg now and I let out a whimper, he looked scared for a second and let go, rubbing his face. It went back to his tired resting face.

"You don't apologize, expecially when you were defending yourself. I was testing you, of course your life wasn't meaningless Cyra. You just don't think that." He was staring into my soul, I could feel it. "You're drowning Cyra, but I'm not seeing you struggle. Your just letting yourself go. I did mean it when I said finding something meaningful here." He was wrapping my leg with a tight bandage, his hands soft against my skin. His voice felt calm, his harsh and forceful tone washed away. All I can look at is the top of his shiny black head.

"Yeah I'm drowning, but I'm not able to die. Everyone is just..Moving and moving. I'm stuck on repeat trying to find that Great Perhaps."

"Great Perhaps?" He looked up with curious eyes.

I laugh from mainly embarassment, I read alot of poetic quotes. He tilts his head.

" Francois Rabelais once said, 'I go now to seek a great perhaps.' And I guess that's what I'm doing too. Moving on to find something. Not alot of moving though. I've been stuck in New York trying to find it."

"I like that...But what makes you think its there, In New York." He said York like Yark, it was amusing.

Well, I go to say but stop. There was nothing there for me. That's not the Perhaps I'm looking for.

He gave me a pearly white grin. But as he stood up, everything I was feeling in that moment dissapeared.

"You didn't hurt her right?" Esteria walked in the room and was in his face now. He just grunted, walking back into the bathroom.

"No. No he didn't. Why did you pick me anyway?" I sat back against the wall, the mattress soft underneath me. I closed my eyes and felt the mattress move down, Esteria's strong perfume, like honey in glass, filling my empty lungs.

"Something about you. I could tell you didn't want to be alone. And you have talent, you needed atleast someone to shove you in the right direction."

"I looked hopeless you mean." I open one eye and look at her, she lets a small smile creep onto her face.

"Yeah pretty hopeless dude. But anyway, Knox never thought you had something in you. Usually he can tell when someone has It."

I open my eyes and scoot over to face her.

"So you've been stalking me for how long? And what's your It?"

"Well, about a year. And I have many things, but one is Prokinesis. Sounds trippy I know. It's like I'm the frickin Lavaboy of this century."

"Fire control. Anything else?"

"Almost everyone here has Gravity Manipulation. Pretty much making anything appear anywhere. The only person who has the ability to alternate space and time though, is Knox."

"What about me? I don't think I have anything. Where's the radioactive spider that bites everyone."

We both chuckle a little and she shrugs. "I don't expect you to find it..Yet. You saw something but you didn't want to believe it huh. Mabye you'll find it sooner if you opened your eyes for a moment." She sat up and opened a small closet.

"If this is a place for people who were never understood. What's your oh so tragic backstory."

"Nothing of importance to you. If your hungry come to dinner."

I shook my head and looked out the window. You could see pretty much all of New York from here. I don't know where here is but I know I probably shouldn't stay. The life I was supposed to try and live with was out there. I turned and Esteria was walking out, and Knox was walking in. He headed to a small closet in the corner and I continued to look out the window, at everything so fake yet so enhancing. New York was an artifical jungle you get lost in.

"I assume you chose to stay? Your Great Perhaps isn't out there love." He turned around and started getting undress. I avoid looking at him, opening the window to let a soft zephry float through my hair and kiss my cheeks with its cold lips.

"If you can convince me in a week that I am meant for this place then sure, I will stay. Chances are I'm to broken to believe in anything right now." I lay down on the bed, even though it's not mine.

"Okay, In fact it's already becoming a hobby to prove you wrong." He laughed at himself and I grunted, trying to keep my eyes open. I heard the door open and he was gone.

Within moments I was drifting off, thinking of everything since the beginning of my life, what was I looking for?