Bellona- The Blaze of Ice

chapter 45

"I like Alexandre, a bit, i guess." Eth muttered, looking up the ceiling while laying down beside me on the bed. I stroked Xerxes' back, who was cuddled to my stomach.

"Yeah, i think something changed after he came to know i am an assassin." i turned to look at him, and he was deep in thought, his nose scrunched up like the thought was too disgusting. 

"What are you thinking?" I asked, poking his cheek, to make him turn to me. He smiled, and those dimples made my heart melt to a puddle of water. We stared at each other, unwilling to look away.

"Can i ask you a question, my love?" He broke the silence. I nodded in return. He did not say anything for a while, turning back towards the ceiling. Xerxes licked my hand, and snuggled closer.

"What do you look for in a boyfriend?" He asked quietly, almost like he was afraid of the answer. Weird question, and an equally confusing tone.

"What do i look for in a boyfriend? You know i never really gave a single thought bout relationships, yeah?" I chuckled, looking at him confused, as to why he would ask this. He however, did not laugh with me. He was staring at me, not, studying me, observing each and every blink of my eye, every strand of my hair, and every twitch of my lips. 

I sighed in thought. "Someone, who can protect me. Honestly, i am tired of fighting, fighting for my survival, fighting for other's safety, i am fucking tired of it. But at the same time, he should be my save haven, someone i can trust with my life, someone who trusts me with his life, knows how to have fun and can take a prank, someone with whom there is no dull moment, someone who accepts me with all these scars-" I said that word with a sneer of disgust, and Eth immediately clasped his hand on my mouth, a stern look on his face. 

"Look at me." he said softly. I kept my eyes lowered to the bed.

"Taylor. Look. At. Me." He ordered sternly, lifting my chin. When he saw my face, he kissed both my cheeks.  

"You-" He kissed my nose, "Are-" He kissed my forehead, "So-" He kissed my chin, "Beautiful" This time he just looked deep in my eyes, and i think i saw his eye flicker down, but then he kissed my temple. My cheeks were probably like a tomato now. I think my Xerxes did not like Ethan kissing my face, for he licked my forehead, then my nose, and my chin. (AN; my heart melted while writing this).

"And he must be able to cook, cause lord knows i can't" I exclaimed, trying to ease off the tense air. He chuckled, propping on one elbow to look at me, slightly hovering over me.

"The last time you tried cooking, you made a rock out of an egg. I don't even know how you managed to achieve this feat." He laughed, and i grinned at the sound.

"Hey, it was not my fault okay, it was boiling and then the flame was high and then water spilt out and, well i thought it was normal, and then when i checked on the egg, it was black and rock solid. How the hell is any of this my fault?" I pouted, crossing my arms over Xerxes, who was now almost asleep.

"Oh yeah? Well who told you it takes 45 minutes for one egg to boil?" He cocked his eyebrow sarcastically.

"And that is why, my future boyfriend needs to know how to cook." I grinned back at him. His grin fell a little, before he framed a fake smile, resting his head on his arm.

"You sound like you are talking about someone specific. Care enough to tell me?" He furrowed his brows in curiosity. I blushed at his question. Yeah, its you. I  didn't even realise i was basically describing him.

"Nope" I mumbled.

"So you are not going to tell me, or there is no one?" He asked.

"Not gonna tell you." I teased, watching his smile fall, this time he did not even make an attempt to hide his...sadness? I guess.