Guilt

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Legolas POV

After the battle, I went to search for Aragorn, whom I hadn't seen for some time, as he had led the forces by the gates, and I had been on the wall. Finally I found him in the caves with Éowyn, and at first my heart gave a little sting, but then I heard the topic of their conversation, and I realised it didn't need to feel jealous. They were talking about someone badly wounded and discussed treatments. 

"Who is it you are talking about?", I asked as I approached them. 

"Legolas", Aragorn simply said, and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. But he didn't look very happy. Éowyn gave him a look, then sighed and turned to answer me.

"Haldir has been wounded, badly wounded. Aragorn saw it happen in the battle and brought him here."

"How badly is badly?", I asked back and began to worry. Haldir was not the type to get wounded so easily.

"He might die."

Aragorn said it so dryly, that I looked up at him. His eyes were filled with tears and he was pressing his lips together. 

"And I could have saved him", he spoke again. "If I had been there just a second earlier I could've killed that stupid orc that shot him. I was there! Legolas, it's all my fault!"

The last few sentences he said with so much sorrow that it nearly broke my heart. This was typical for the man, being guilty of things he didn't have an influence on. 

"It's not your fault!", I answered. "Don't make yourself believe that you could have saved him. You couldn't have, and you did the right thing bringing him here. Éowyn will best know what to do."

She looked at me doubtfully, but I signalled her with my eyes that she shouldn't comment on it. If we didn't want a broken Aragorn, we needed to choose the right words now.

"We'll find a quiet space to discuss this", I stated and took Aragorn's hand. With a nod to Éowyn I dragged him out of the cave and through the fortress to a little hidden spot on the wall where we could sit and he could calm down.

---

The whole fortress was sprinkled with blood and dead people were lying around everywhere, because nobody had had time to bury them yet. It smelled death and misery in the air, and I almost choked, but there was nowhere else to go, so we had to endure it. The place I was heading for was looking out over the valley, and at least some fresh air reached it. Having found it, I pressed down Aragorn on a stone bench and sat opposite him, so that I could watch his face.

Huge tears were welling out from his eyes and he buried his head in his hands. He was in a terrible state and it was heartbreaking to watch. 

"You did all you could", I started. "If you hadn't been there, that orc had probably killed Haldir in the blink of an eye. You saved him, Aragorn. You gave him the chance to live!"

I could feel how my words lifted a huge weight of Aragorn's shoulders, and he seemed to calm down a bit. Still, I felt the need to say something more, something that took all his guilt away.

"You always do all you can! Remember back in Edoras, when I was feeling unwell, you were there to save me. Now you were here to save Haldir. It's all you ever do, saving people!"

Aragorn lifted his head from his hands and looked at me. His expression was sad, but I noticed a tiny bit of hope.

"Thank you", he whispered, and now I shuffled over to him and leaned my head on his shoulder. "You always make me feel better."

My heart warmed at his words and a smile spread on my face. Suddenly I was filled with love for this man, and I pulled his head around to me and kissed him. Very gently, just a thank you for his words. But Aragorn kissed me back with so much need, that the kiss got fierce and passionate. He entangled his hands in my hair, and I put my arms around his neck. It felt like he needed to hold on to me to prevent himself from falling. 

I don't know how it happened, but suddenly I was on his lap with my legs on either side of him, and he pulled me even closer, while his hand was on my back. And it kept going further down, first to my belt then to my waistband. It felt so good to be close to him that I forgot everything around me and let myself enjoy this moment. Deep moans escaped his throat, and he breathed fast and raggedly. 

"Legolas!", he moaned into my mouth and I was completely lost in his love. 

But suddenly a pungent smell of blood filled my nose and I remembered where we were. This was still a fortress with a whole army of soldiers in it, and someone could walk in on us any time.

"Maybe we shouldn't...", I started, but he took my lips in another kiss and I couldn't finish my sentence. Barely managing to free my mouth, I tried again. "This isn't the right place."

At first he didn't seem to understand what I had said, but then he stopped and looked around and it seemed that he just now returned to the battlestricken fortress.

"We can continue this another time", I told him and gave him one final kiss on his lips. "I enjoyed it very much!"

"Me too", he smiled and let go of my hair. "But you're right, let's return to the others. However, first, let me fix that hair of yours..."

I loved him so much.

Hi guys, I just wanted to say that I'm not used to writing this stuff, but I tried my best. Hope you like it!

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