Broken

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"You told them didn't you?"

Fawn was awake. She had been for a few hours but this was the first time she had spoken. Only James, Lily and Regulus were in the room with her at the moment. Regulus refused to look her in the eye. James' leg was bouncing. Lily was pacing, either checking vitals or faking being occupied.

The hospital room was drab. The curtains, walls, floors and sheets were all an off-white, the only bits of color were because of some of the medical equipment. A soft beeping sound from the heart monitor was annoying the group but no one said anything.

Fawn hated hospitals, the hospital wing at Hogwarts was the only exception. It seemed nothing good came from them—perhaps birth but even that was iffy.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do," whispered Regulus.

"How long has it been?"

   "A month."

Cold panic coursed through Fawn's veins. One month; thirty days of doing nothing. Her plan to work fast with finding and destroying all horcrux was slipping through her fingers. It must've been October by now, maybe November. James was wearing a jacket. James never wore jackets, James never got cold unless it got below ten degrees celsius (50° F).

Two more years.

"What's the date?"

James rubbed his hands against his trousers and sighed tiredly. "October twenty-fourth. You've been here since the nineteenth of September."

So Hermione was born now, Ron was on the way and Harry would be conceived in the next couple weeks. Everything was becoming far too real. "Shit."

Lily's eyes widened and Regulus scoffed bitterly.

  "Did the healer say when I could be released?"

  "She's thinking about a few more days but you'll be home before Halloween."

James grinned weakly. "Sirius still has the party idea y'know."

  "A coming home Halloween party sounds brilliant."

Regulus coughed. "Since when did you like parties?"

  "Since we almost died twice in a row."

  "Fair enough."

"I'm sorry," Lily interrupted, "twice?"

  "Well technically this is like my fifth near-death experience but you know..."

  Lily looked abashed and if Fawn wasn't already under such good care Lily would be sure to start mothering. She shook her head and sat with the rest of the group, clearly deciding that her methods of self-distraction weren't working.

James took her hand in his and gave a small grimace-like smile for comfort but no one could even begin to dream of comfort in a time like this. Fawn had been in a coma for over a month, fighting high levels of lethal poison, Regulus had been having dozens of panic attacks a week, and no one had slept since everything happened. Comfort was a fairytale at the time.

"Did you destroy it, Reg?"

Regulus nodded but still wouldn't look up. "It put up quite a fight, I almost couldn't do it..."

  "Well you did so that's all that matters."

  "Yeah..."

Fawn frowned at the doubt in his tone, he seemed to have taken a dozen steps backwards. She knew this must have been traumatic for him but this unexpected. This was not the reaction that she thought Regulus would have. Her eyes bore into the side of his face, he could feel it but didn't even blink.

"Please look at me, Reg." His head shook.

"Please..."

"I can't."

  "Why?"

  "I failed you."

Fawn squeezed her eyes shut. Her eyes burned with unshed tears. A headache pounded through her skull. "You didn't fail me, Regulus."

  "I revealed your sec—"

"You had to, to save me. I don't blame you. I'm honestly shocked my facade didn't crack sooner."

A tear dropped onto the cold, specked and scuffed tile. A heavy sniff was heard. Regulus wiped his face. Fawn reached out and placed her hand on his quivering shoulder.

Finally he faced her with red-rimmed eyes and a snot-filled nose. He was a scared little boy all over again. His inner-child had never been given the chance to heal.

It was the first Regulus Black truly broke. Everyone had expected the break to be with Sirius but they were wrong. It was the young heir playing double agent and secret-keeper who carried the world on his shoulders that couldn't bear to deal with it anymore.

His sobs were heart-wrenching. The tears that fell down that porcelain, un-scathed face burned all. When it was clear his robes would need dry-cleaning they knew it was done for. Soft, curly black hair became plastered to his forehead. And he cried. Merlin, did he cry.

Earthquakes raked through that fragile body at a level ten. His fingers grasped onto the hospital bed sheets but even that didn't seem to be enough. Fawn brushed through his hair and whispered sweet-nothings. This time there was no use in trying. Regulus coughed through his sobs. Lily rubbed his back. James swallowed thickly, he hadn't even seen Sirius like this before. Even after a calming draught, he was still sniffling.

"I'm so-sorry..."

Fawn's expression was soft and clouded with empathy, knowing just how much pressure he was feeling, how much of it was her fault. "I'm the one who's sorry. You wouldn't be going through half of this if it weren't for me."

"You saved me. I owe-owed you."

  "No, Reg, you didn't. I'm sorry if I made you feel like you did."

He looked up, his gaze fierce and sincere. "I chose to do this Fawn, I know what I signed up for, I knew it'd be a lot. This is not your fault, it has never been."

"I've been trying to save people from their fates but I think I made you a self-fulfilling prophecy."

She believed that. Regulus may not have died the same way he was meant to, but a piece of him had and Fawn held that piece in her cold, revived, hands. She broke Regulus Black and there was no way to glue him back together.

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A/N

It will start getting happier... eventually.

I'm on day 7 of lock-jaw yippee 🙄

Sorry for the short chapters.

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