✅ Potty Genius [NaNoWriMo 2022]

Forty-One

¿What did you tell your dad?

I was too embarrassed to say anything at all. My brain just froze, and I wasn't thinking anything. I didn't even understand why he was saying something like that. How could he have known?

"Did you find your diapers?" he called, and I stopped moving mid-step. "I took them up to your room. The boxes don't stand up to the elements, you know? If you're expecting a delivery, you should probably let us know so somebody can be here. Take them in before they get wet. You should check if the inner packaging is damaged, though. You might be able to claim against the shipping company if they're damaged. Say they should have left them under more cover, or whatever."

"I... uhh... No, they're fine," I stammered, not sure what else I could say. He hadn't asked me why I was buying them. What must be going through his mind now? I tried to imagine how I would feel if my adult daughter was ordering diapers without telling me, and I couldn't even think about it. I could only guess that he had been as shocked as I had been when I found that I needed them. But he seemed calm enough now... Maybe that meant I could get away without actually saying anything.

"Okay. It might be a good idea to let us know in future when you're expecting something. I mean, they can't be cheap."

"N... no..." I stammered. This was really weird, and not at all in the way I'd expected. I had thought they would be full of questions, demanding to know why I was wasting my money on diapers when I was only a few weeks away from my big journey to university. Or to tell me I would have to stay at home until I fully recovered from the app's influence. Or that they wouldn't believe an app could do something like that, and would think there was something wrong with me. I certainly didn't want them insisting on therapy or something instead of university. But for Dad to just accept it left me completely off balance. I did my best to work out what I should say, and eventually landed on "Don't worry, I'm not ordering any more. I mean..."

I stammered and mumbled, then took a deep breath and forced myself to focus. No matter how calm he seemed, I absolutely didn't want Dad to think that I needed diapers. I needed to make that clear.

"I'm not going to order any more," I said. "I mean... I didn't order those ones. I've got this..." I hesitated a little, trying to work out how to explain in a way that wouldn't just lead to more questions. "There's this app on my phone. I've been working out how it works. And it's got shopping functions, where it can order stuff automatically when it thinks you need it. I'm going to disable it, so it can't buy anything else without asking me. Because clearly there's something wrong in the AI if it's ordering diapers."

"Oh, okay," he said. "Do you need to send them back, then? Your mother can drive you to the post office if you need help."

"Oh, no," I said, and rapidly tried to make up something else. "I mean... I enabled the app to make purchases, and I didn't understand all the settings, I guess. So if I send them back I'd still have to pay return shipping. And the shipping is more than they're worth now. So... I did something dumb, and I'll admit to that. But now they're here, there's no benefit to returning them. May as well save them in case I meet anyone who needs them, I guess. Because I don't. Don't need diapers, I mean."

"Of course you don't," he said. "You're a big girl now."

"Yeah!" I agreed proudly, and it was a full second before I realised that was totally not what a real big girl would say. I shouldn't be beaming with delight just because somebody told me I was a big girl. And I couldn't think of anything else I could say about it that wouldn't just dig this hole deeper. I turned around and ran up the stairs, just hoping that he hadn't heard.

¿Could you not return the diapers?

I might have been able to. But the problem was, my parents had seen them. And if I was claiming that they'd been ordered by mistake, I would have to return them with the original shipping note. And Dad, wanting to make sure everything was neat and in order, was bound to check that all the return paperwork was filled in correctly. He trusted me and Mum to do that kind of stuff, but he would always check it. And if he checked it, he would expect to see that I was returning all the packs of diapers.