✅ Potty Genius [NaNoWriMo 2022]

Forty-Six

This bonus chapter is dedicated to Eladon. Thank you for all your support on Patreon!

¿Did you manage to hold it?

Of course. I might be shorter than you, but I'm not an actual baby. The pressure in my bladder was pretty urgent, but I was sure I would be able to hold it. A whole hour would have been painful, but I knew that the time I had to wait was less than that. The time drinking water and juice; talking to Dad; getting ready to go out; and the walking before I thought to start a timer could all be subtracted from that hour. So could the walk home after the alarm sounded on my phone.

I called up Potty Genius, wondering just how much time I had left. And there wasn't any indicator, save that my daily challenge had an "in progress" banner next to it, and a warning that I wasn't supposed to take my diaper off when I called up the potty report page. However, I quickly noticed that there was also a notification popping up for me. I didn't know what that could be, and half suspected that the challenge was going to make me wet myself again. But even if it did, would that be a problem? I would still have been dry six out of the last seven days, which was good enough to graduate from the app, once I got the challenges complete.

I was surprised when I opened the notification and found that I had earned a badge. This one was called 'dancing mad level 1', and was apparently awarded for completing ten thousand steps between bathroom breaks. I wondered what would be needed for level two, and also what the badge could offer. It said it would encourage me to dance when I needed the bathroom; and after trying a few of these things, I was sure that there was a hidden catch. I could probably guess what it would be without even trying it.

¿Did you try it?

Of course not. I exited the badges interface, and kept on checking the app every five minutes until it let me pee again. By that point, I was so desperate it was almost painful. But I was one daily challenge away from graduation. I was ready to be potty trained, just like a big girl. And I felt so proud of myself, until I realised that the pride was just coming from the last vestiges of the teddy badge left in my subconscious mind. But when I thought about it, I knew that I had good reason to be proud. Beating that app was a real challenge, and I had almost done it.

And I had the challenge completed. I only needed one more. I waited a couple of minutes, and the next daily challenge appeared. I could look now, or wait until a day after I'd started the last one; but I was impatient to finish my potty training before going to see Dr Theo again. I decided that I was going to try this one, even if it was something that would normally have been too much for me. Like a grand finale to end my humiliation, I guessed. Better to let it happen once rather than keep on not knowing when the app would fail a timer at university.

This challenge was called 'Random Number God'; and it was one that could have been easy or terrible, depending on when I got it. All it asked was that I equip the newest badge on my collection, and keep it on for at least eight hours. A little note explained that if I wanted to try to earn another badge before the end of the day and use that one, it would be acceptable. Just so long as I put the badge on before the day ended, and didn't take it off.

So, was I brave enough to risk a badge that would make me do a "dance", just to break this app's control over me at last?

¿Did you try it?

I wasn't sure if I should. Sure, I'd decided that I was willing to go beyond my usual embarrassment threshold if it was like a last challenge. But I'd barely noticed the effects of the teddy badge in the last week, and I really didn't want to put myself back into a state where I always had to choose a badge. On the other hand, Theo had said that completing the game gave you a badge to let you use the potty normally, didn't she? So enabling the badges could have been a good thing. Preparing my brain to regain control again, when I switched from the dancing badge to the victory one.

I couldn't decide, so I sent an email to Dr Theo, asking what she thought I should do. I knew that she would probably say it was better to complete the app, but coming to the final hurdle I was suddenly nervous. Was that because I knew how much the badges could interfere with my judgement? Or was it because I was finally confronting the possibility of going back to normal, and some part of me really didn't want to?

I might have decided to do it anyway, but that was about the time there was a knock on my door. I glanced around to make sure all the diapers were out of sight, and there was nothing here that could embarrass me. Then I opened the door, and gave Mum a big smile as I asked what she wanted.

¿Did your Mum figure anything out?

No. I checked, and there was nothing in sight. She just wanted to make sure that I was ready for my first days at Moistville University.

"Your father and I have been thinking," she said. "It's like a tradition, I hear, when you first go to university. Now, it's not going to be a long drive for you. We'll be able to get you there in little more than an hour, but you'll still be away from your family for the first time, and I'm nervous about that."

"I'll be fine, Mum. I'm a big girl, I can look after myself." And that was true, no matter how much my subconscious mind didn't want it to be at times.

"I know you can. You've always acted pretty mature. And we're grateful for that. But you're carrying a huge burden now, and we want to help you ease the strain a little. We want to make sure you're ready, so everything will go smoothly on your first night away. You can be in charge if you want, but we're going to make sure that your luggage is all packed up, so that when you get to Moistville you can open your bags and you'll be at home there. And trust me, when you're leaving home for the first time, you could use the help of somebody who's moved house before. You don't want to be learning about all the common mistakes the hard way."

I couldn't really argue with that. But then Mum's eyes went to where Junior was sitting in my bed, the covers pulled up around his chin. The teddy looked so calm there, and I realised that I had told Mum weeks ago that I'd only lifted him out of the cupboard to take some photos for nostalgia's sake. I didn't know how I could explain that he was still there, or that the cute blanket had become like a permanent fixture in my room.

"I uhh..." I started, and stammered. What was I going to say? She'd think I was a baby, or that I was losing my mind. And I needed to keep my parents' trust.

"It's nice to see your teddies out again," she said. "For so long, you've been acting like it's forbidden to indulge your inner child, and I don't think that's healthy." I didn't know how to respond to that at all, and after a few seconds she continued: "Was that our fault? We couldn't afford toys when you were younger, and it seemed like you almost... went back so far the other way. Like if you can't have new toys, you'll refuse to play with the ones you've got. And acted like playing was forbidden. I'm glad... You seem to have gotten over that now. Right? We tried everything we could think of to let you know it's okay to be childish, but we had no idea if it was going to work. Once you're in a new place for the first time, a couple of teddies will be a substitute for the parents who can't cuddle you anymore when you're stressed."

"Yeah, I guess..." I mumbled, realising that I was probably the only one who hadn't noticed the psychological downside of forcing myself to put aside childish things so many years ago. If Mum was okay with it, then perhaps I would actually be able to take Junior and Methplease to university with me, and to keep on being a little childish, when I had nothing more important to do.

"What are their names?" she asked. "Do you remember?"

"Junior and Methplease," I answered, blushing just a little. "He was supposed to be Mephistopheles. I saw the name in a book, but couldn't say it when I was that young. I thought it sounded kind of posh. Now it's just..."

When Mum had gotten over her giggles, she told me that they'd been worried a little when I picked the name. And we could laugh together, as we loaded up a couple of suitcases with just about everything that I wouldn't need for my last few nights at home. Methplease and Junior weren't going yet, but we left a space the right size for them in the top of one of the cases. It was such a relief to realise that Mum wouldn't judge me; and even understood my desire to be a little childish again. She didn't know the full extent of it, of course, but now I knew that I didn't have to worry about any subtle childish behaviour at home. I could be a child in little ways this week, and my parents would still support me.