The Agent's Temptation

13. Coffee and Jealousy

Hotch stood over the chief's desk as he looked at maps of the Estes Park mountains.
He tried to find hidden trails, and remote areas one could hide a cabin since the men who had spotted it didn't remember where it was; according to them they had been taking some pills for "a trippy hike" and didn't remember much aside from what they had reported.

Hotch had held back a groan; those college boys could have been the key to solving the case but they decided to use drugs instead.
However; despite his efforts on focusing on the maps, Hotch's mind could help but go back to him seeing you talking to Reid.

He knew Reid must have talked to you about your experience and find solidarity; and also hoping to trigger your memory. But when he saw you reach for Reid's hand and noticed how you smiled at him, he felt a hot flash of burning jealousy run through him.

It had only been hours since he had touched your hand and the feeling still hadn't worn off. He could still feel your warmth and remember the texture of your skin. He had been on his way to talk to you, to find any excuse to be near you, when he had seen you with Reid.

Hotch scoffed and walked away from the desk. "Get it together Aaron," He said to himself. "You've got a job to do."

But he still couldn't stop. Even as he looked outside the window at the police officers pulling in and out of the parking lot, his thoughts were on you. On the way he had felt when he accidentally touched you.
But now those thoughts were tainted with the jealousy of you touching the other men on his team.
The younger men.

Reid was young, brilliant and kind. The boy didn't know or see it, but girls noticed him wherever he went. Even when he started rambling on for no particular reason, women stared at him in awe (or confusion).
And Morgan, well, there wasn't much to say. Women fell at his feet; he was charming, good looking, very fit and charming. And you had mentioned that he was attractive too-so that didn't help.

"She's so much younger than you Hotch, get it together," he said again. He repeated it about 5 times, trying to keep himself from thinking about you.

He'd never felt this way about a victim before, he had not felt those sparks since he had met Haley in high school. But most importantly, he never thought he'd feel them again.

And now, here he was. His mind spiraling and focusing on a young woman almost 20 years younger than him. A young woman he had to focus on protecting; he had to get his mind straight so that he could look for the man who had hurt you.

He wanted to find him and hold him responsible for the kidnappings and mental abuse he had inflicted on the four other women and uncover any other crimes he was guilty of.

Hotch as always, wanted to make sure monsters like him were off the street. But more importantly, he wanted to make sure your monster was behind bars so he couldn't hurt you anymore.

"Hotch?" JJ said as she opened the door to the office he was in.
"Yes?" He replied, slightly turning to look at her.
"I have the files you were looking for this morning," she said, holding up a folder. "They have all the pictures and information you need."
"Thank you JJ, just leave it on the desk."
She nodded but before she left she looked at him closely.
He seemed tired, more than usual. And she had noticed that he had been more distant than normal with the team.

She knew it was two years since Haley's death; she couldn't imagine what he was feeling.
"Can I get you anything? A coffee? A cheerful call with Garcia?"
Hotch slightly smiled at this and turned fully to face her. "I think Derek would benefit more from that than me."
"You're definitely right about that," JJ said smiling and closed the door behind her.

Hotch took a in a deep breath as he picked up the folder JJ had left on the desk. Inside were pictures of all types of deer and stag-related animals in the area. He even had Garcia research animals in the nearby states that fit the description of anything deer and stag-like. He wanted to sit with you and show you the pictures to narrow down which animal head it was you had seen; it might not seem like a lot but the animal had significance.

He cleared his throat and opened the door. When he stepped out he heard the quick chatter of officers down the hall, phones ringing and radios sounding off broken messages from one person to the other.
He was used to this environment; this was his safe space. He knew how to navigate an investigation; he knew how to act quick, think rationally and make hard decisions.

He could do this.
It was just another job.
Another case.

Hotch was an FBI agent; the leader of his team.
He had saved so many lives, his team trusted him and he knew he was good at what he did.
There was nothing to worry about.

But just as he turned the corner, ready to tackle the case head on and focused, he crashed into you.

"Oh!" You exclaim as you stumble backwards and the coffee you had in hand spills all over you.
Some got on Hotch's shirt and pants too but he was wearing dark colors so it didn't really show. On you however, the brown stains on your pale blue shirt and white converse stood out.

"I am so sorry!" You say, reaching for napkins from the coffee table near you. You hadn't even noticed who it was you had crashed into but you felt immediately terrible for not being aware of your surroundings.

It wasn't until you reach out to clean the coffee off from the person's shirt that you realize it was Hotch.
Your hands were patting the shirt and tux jacket so hard that you felt a familiar warmth seep through the fabric.

You look up and Hotch was frozen, standing completely still under your touch. He was looking at you with his dark eyes so intensely that as always, your breath caught. Memories of having touched his hand that morning came flooding back and you could only imagine how much warmer and stronger he felt under his shirt where your hands rested.

You wanted to pull away, to step back and put distance between you. But you couldn't; Hotch's hard eyes were pinning you down and you could almost swear you felt him pressing against your hands as well.