Just Friends

22

୪𝚃𝚎𝚜𝚜୪

I think I made a mistake. A big one.

I don't know why I did it. There was no reason for it, and I haven't been thinking about it. It sort of just...happened.

I sort of thought it might be time for a change. A good one! Like the one I made just a few months back.

Usually I'd think it over some more. Maybe sleep on the idea and see how I feel in about a week.

I slept on the idea, but failed to wait a week.

With a deep breath, I lift my hand to comb it through my hair in the mirror. It stops just below my chin now.

It's not like it looks bad or anything. I have myself some nice layers, and I have a good texture to my hair. It's wavy.

It's just very...high school Tess.

Yikes.

My nose scrunches when I huff and slam the heels of my palms down in the bathroom counter, leaning in closer to the mirror.

At least when I dyed it, I'd been thinking about doing it for months. And I didn't really mean to cut it. I just wanted to see what it'd look like!

"It's just hair." I repeat the same thing I normally tell the nervous people who want a change that sit in the chair in front of me. "It'll grow back." I shrug softly.

And hey! Maybe this is cute. I mean, it is cute. But maybe not for me.

I'm not usually this...random. A bunch of things have been happening as of late, but I never do such compulsive things. I think this has just been me finally letting myself be.

Even though I kind of regret the last hour and a half, I start to smile at my reflection and straighten up.

I laugh.

I laugh because I'm too old to be compulsively cutting and dyeing my hair at the drop of a shoe. I laugh because my luck so far as gone to shit, and it's starting to become funny.

I laugh because my phone starts to ring with a conveniently timed phone call from one of the people I haven't been able to stop thinking about.

He's sort of just been in the back of my mind always. I keep finding myself wondering what he's doing, who he's with, and what he'd think of whatever I'm doing.

I've never been so concerned with what a boy might be doing or what he might think about me in my life. It's kind of sickening.

I'm still laughing at myself when I answer his call before it can go to voicemail. "Yeah?" I giggle.

Wasn't I just on the phone with Levi? That didn't end well for me. For either of us, really. I probably shouldn't be on the phone with him right now.

Levi doesn't answer me for a few seconds even though he's the one who called me. "Hey." He mutters.

"Hi." I laugh some more and play with my hair in the mirror. I try pulling it in a ponytail, but end up just laughing at how tiny it is. It's kind of cute.

"What's so funny?" He asks quietly, confused. Maybe he thinks I'm laughing at him, I don't know.

"A lot of things." I simply answer, still giggling like a schoolgirl. "What's up?" I coax, silently wondering why he's decided to call me now.

The last time we were on the phone, I pissed him off and then hung up to eat my over salted food. We haven't talked since.

It's a little sad how we've drifted apart over the past couple of weeks. It may or may not be my fault too.