Dear Mister Summers

forty four

(( a rather long chapter ahead, enjoy~~ ^^ )))

The rest of the day, Andin tried not to think about her situation with Sebastian. She was just going to live in the moment. It would last as long as it lasted. Yet, in a small corner of her heart, she hoped that everything would work out somehow. That they would find some way to be together, but in her head, she knew that was not realistic. This relationship was doomed to end in heartache, but perhaps if she was careful, maybe she would not lose her whole heart to him. If she was careful, maybe she could guard one last piece. But deep down in her heart, she knew that she had not been careful at all or else she would not end up pregnant.

Later that afternoon, a package arrived at her mother's house that stole any remaining piece of her heart that did not already firmly belong to him. The box was wrapped in white paper with a big blue and white striped bow. Inside there was a book but it was not just any other book. It was 'The Very Hungry Caterpillar' by Eric Carle. The book pictographically described the evolution of a caterpillar eating its way through an array of food to eventually pupate into a beautiful butterfly. It was a gift from her grandmother back when she had been a kid however when Andin and her mother had been moving from town to town, avoiding debt collectors, she had lost it.

She knew that this book was not exactly what she had had back then but the fact that he had just sent her this made her feel warm inside. When they had a pillow talk and talked about their childhood, he truly listened to her. There was a card inside. The card simply read 'To learn more about you'. It was not signed but she knew who had sent the book. Other than her mother who probably had forgotten about it, only Sebastian knew about it.

Andin sat on the couch with the box in her lap. Her eyes filled with tears and the back of her throat felt hot and scratchy. She tried unsuccessfully to blink back the moisture in her eyes, but she was no more successful at that than she was holding back the swell of her heart. She was in love with him. It was impossible. Inappropriate, and she didn't feel good about it. Not the kind of good that falling should feel like.

"What is that?" her mother asked as she walked into the living room.

Andin ducked her head. "Nothing."

"It is obviously not nothing."

She brushed her wet cheek against the shoulder of her Disney T-shirt. "Someone sent me a book."

"What book?" Her mother peered from her shoulder, and her eyes widened. "The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Your favorite book when you were a kid. Your grandma gave that to you, did she not?"

So her mother did remember. "Yes."

"Who was the sender?"

"I do not know. It is not signed."

"Really? How long do you think you can keep this up?"

"What?"

It earned her a dry look from her mother. "Andin, I might be one year older tomorrow, but I am not senile. Everything adds up to a new man in your life. And I am happy for you. After all, you are twenty-six."

"Mm-hmm." A safe, non-committal reply.

"You can tell me all about him you know," said her mother with an indulgent smile.

Not all about him, Andin darkly decided. Her mother did not deserve to have her birthday ruined. She was not sure how many things she could share with her mother before disapproval kicked in.

"I know we are not close and that we have never talked about this. You always go to Damon every time you have something you want to share with someone, every time you face an issue. It does not have to be that way, Andin."