Still Holding On

Chapter 42

Tony is honestly shocked that this many people were willing to hop on a FaceTime call at 2:30 in the morning. It's not only Tony and Fury; both Clint and Rhodey are here, too — the latter because Tony explained everything and he wanted to know the details, and the former, of course, because the conversation is about him.

"It's really hazy," Clint tells them. "I've been trying to piece most of it together from my dreams and from what Nat's told me, but I don't really remember it anymore. It's just... blurry."

"And you're saying Loki's the same way?" Rhodey asks his friend. "Minus the whole 'knowing it's real' thing?"

"That's what I'm thinking," Tony says. "He doesn't really remember anything. It sounds like he's been dreaming about it, but he has no idea that it was..." He trails off and shakes his head. It's just a weird situation all around.

"Are you gonna tell him?" Rhodey asks.

Tony scoffs. "No, I am not gonna tell him!" he says indignantly. "Telling him isn't going to help anything."

"I'm just saying," Rhodey says, "if Barton can piece things together from his dreams, maybe Loki—"

"And leave him feeling guilty over something someone made him do?" Tony shakes his head. "I'm not telling him anything. He doesn't need this."

"But maybe he deserves it," Clint says.

Tony clenches his jaw. "Look, I'm sorry that he mind-controlled you—"

"I don't mean it like that," Clint interrupts. "From what I remember, he was actually pretty nice to me, all things considered. But don't you think he deserves to know what he did? This is a pretty big secret to keep from someone you claim is your friend."

"Why would I want to tell him that he's literally a terrorist?" Tony asks incredulously. "How is that going to do anything but upset him?"

"Well, first of all, you won't be keeping a giant-ass secret from your friend," Clint says. "I think he'd rather hear it from you than someone else. And then he can piece it together after that. He doesn't have to wonder why he's having all these weird connecting dreams."

"I'm pretty damn sure he'd rather have recurring nightmares than know that he—"

Knock knock.

Squeak.

Tony spins around in his chair to see Loki standing in the doorway. His tangled hair falls loosely in his face, and in his arms sits Edward, hugged close to his chest.

Tony cocks his head to the side. "Hey, what're you doing up?"

"Um..." Loki's gaze flickers to the hologram of his meeting. "If you're busy..."

"I'm never too busy for you," Tony assures him. "JARVIS, cut the display."

"Audio as well?" JARVIS asks.

"Audio too," Tony says. They can cut the call for a minute. Loki's more important. "I'll be right back."

"Of course, sir."

With that settled, Tony looks up at the god with a tired smile. "What's up?"

Loki shrugs sheepishly. "You weren't there when I woke up."

"Yeah, sorry," Tony says awkwardly. "I thought I could sneak out and sneak back without you noticing." It's only been, like, ten minutes. It's just his luck that Loki would wake up within ten minutes of him sneaking away. "Are you okay?"

Loki hesitates. "Just... wondered where you were."

"Well, you found me," Tony says with a small smile. "You need something?"